Celebrities make a very good living out of media attention and have chosen to live in the public spotlight. They have no right to complain when they feel the media are intruding on their privacy. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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Famous personalities prefer to get attention from public by remaining in news on b

ig screen.

Suggestion

the big screen

a big screen

It is commonly perceived that they do not have p

rivilege

Suggestion

privileges

to withhold media from sharing their personal

life

Use synonyms

on programs. I totally disagree with

this

Linking Words

statement as it might negatively impact on their viewers. On one hand, it is argued that celebrities have no choice rather than their

life

Use synonyms

being shared t

Suggestion

with

their followers. People are more interested to know about their social activities as they believe them to be their role model. They are keen to get aware how they balance their

life

Use synonyms

on screen and after that so they can follow it.

For example

Linking Words

, public follow the Bollywood star Shilpa S

hetty who

Accept comma addition

Shetty, who

practice yoga exercises along with h

ealthy nourished

Accept comma addition

healthy, nourished

diet to remain fit i

Suggestion

into

routine.

Hence

Linking Words

, breach of privacy is directly associated with the f

ame.

Suggestion

famous

On the other hand

Linking Words

, it is

also

Linking Words

believed that stars have w

ish

Suggestion

wished

wishing

to avoid media from showcasing their family

life

Use synonyms

on television. They think that it would have h

azardous effect

Suggestion

a hazardous effect

hazardous effects

on their fans if they start appreciating each and every aspect of their personal

life

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, once youth started believing and misinterpreting that one should refrain himself from getting married in order to become famous like the actor Salman Khan because, it will distract them from their aim to become a film star.

Thus

Linking Words

, well-known people should have authority to keep media away from intervening into their privacy. In conclusion, it is thought that celebrities love to be in d

iscussion

Suggestion

the discussion

which can be linked with the violation of their privacy and they have no wish to raise voice against it. I completely disagree that superstars have right to argue against media if they are forced to depict their social

life

Use synonyms

on talk shows as

this

Linking Words

can be dangerous for the society.

Wed Jan 29 2020

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

304 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Public spotlight
Media intrusion
Social contract
Paparazzi
Ethical limits
Mental health
Privacy rights
Public persona
Harassment
Media scrutiny

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