IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

The best way to reduce youth crimes is to educate their parents with parental skills. To what extent you agree or disagree

#youth #crimes #parents #skills
Some people argue that providing parents with necessary parenting techniques is the most effective way to cope with increasing rates of juvenile delinquency. From my perspective, joint efforts
from
Suggestion
of
 families and schools are needed to curb those heightened concerns. To start with, children tend to unconsciously imitate words and actions of adults.
Therefore
, it is of paramount importance that parents should serve as powerful role models not only through direct interactions with their children, but through the examples they set with their attitude and
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
 within the family and in the outside world. There is mounting evidence that bad upbringing can exert bad implications on a child’s livelihood, increasing the chance of their involvement in juvenile offences.
Therefore
, parental training
such
 as developing and practicing positive discipline technique could prevent and reduce youth crimes.
On the other hand
, schools and other educational institutions
also
 play a major part in the prevention and control of juvenile
crime
. While parents can act as the
first
defense
(military) military action or resources protecting a country against potential enemies
defence
 in decreasing young offenders, it is noteworthy that children may commit a
crime
 or other wrongdoings under negative peer pressure at school.
In other words
, schools
second
 only to families in their potential to affect children’s mental health. They can contribute to young people’s
success
Suggestion
successful
 development by providing
nurturance
any substance that can be metabolized by an animal to give energy and build tissue
nutrients
 and the opportunity to develop social and psychological skills. Eventually, school-based programs are crucial in keeping children from embarking on a life of
crime
. In conclusion, in order to address the problem of youth
crime
, parental training along with positive school guidance for youngsters would help shape young minds into law-abiding citizens.
Submitted by hnamca on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • mandatory
  • equip
  • psychological
  • constructively
  • foster
  • empowered
  • isolated
  • escalation
  • multi-faceted approach
  • eradicate
  • peer influence
  • socio-economic status
What to do next:
Look at other essays: