IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

What are your career aspirations upon graduation of the degree-programme? Please describe, how are you going to secure these your career-goals? How do you see your career to progress over the next five years?

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I have still a great thirst for higher education. My aim is to do a Master's in entrepreneurship. I want to achieve
the highest
Suggestion
higher
the higher
 education in some
business
Use synonyms
 & Management subject to make myself competent enough to build a good and lucrative future of my dreams. Upon graduation from
business
Use synonyms
 school, I was offered a job in the pharmaceutical sector at middle-level management.
This
Linking Words
 is where I learned how to apply the principles and lessons of management to real life. It was fascinating and transformed my interest in entrepreneurship research into a passion. I read extensively, trying to keep myself informed about entrepreneurs thinking in my areas of work. By going
in
Suggestion
into
 great depth and findings, I realized that I should go abroad for higher studies because the methods and facilities available here are
scare
Suggestion
scared
 to help me in competing for the challenges of the growing world. My
first
Linking Words
 and foremost goal is to achieve
this
Linking Words
 degree so that I will be able to capture the entrepreneurial opportunities in my country by establishing my own
business
Use synonyms
 of international standards. After that, I
further
Linking Words
 plan to expand that
business
Use synonyms
 at the national and international levels. In the future, I want to become an employer and to provide jobs. I think in
this
Linking Words
 way I can help my country to reduce the unemployment rate that helps my country people to lead a good and meaningful life.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, It will give tangible and intangible rewards like independence, flexibility, power, and monetary reward.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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