IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

All cars that burn fossil fuels should be banned and electric cars should replace them. Do you agree or disagree?

#cars #fuels
All transportation methods that use fossil
fuel
Fix the agreement mistake
fuels
show examples
 ought to be prohibited,
thus
 electric ones should be introduced
instead
.   I absolutely agree with
this
 statement as electric
cars
 are environmentally friendly
as well as
 it can provide a wider range of better amenities.   Vehicles that use
electricity
 are obviously better for the environment
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
 nowadays.   On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
 hand
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 alongside industry are growing fast and in many different aspects,
cars
 being  one of the widely
increased
Verb problem
apply
show examples
used
item
Change to a plural noun
items
show examples
 nowadays.
on the other
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 we
faced
Wrong verb form
face
show examples
 a huge issue with all the harmful emissions which will
obtain
Verb problem
have
show examples
 a negative effect.  
Moreover
, as our planet is facing the dangers of global warming, and how
cars’
Change noun form
cars
show examples
  
fuel
 had previously been proven to have a serious role in
this
 disaster, it is about time to find
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 solution and replace
fuel
 with
electricity
.   Sweden is one the pioneer countries in attempting to replace the ancient
fuel dependant
Correct your spelling
fuel-dependent
show examples
 vehicles with modern electrical ones.
Variety
Correct article usage
A variety
show examples
 of qualities
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
electric
cars
 can provide to introduce a better experience for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people.   When it
will be
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 absolutely
dependant
Replace the word
dependent
show examples
 on
electricity
,
this
lift
Correct subject-verb agreement
lifts
show examples
 weights from the
user
Change the noun
user's
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 shoulders,
while
 previously he or she
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 obliged to fill up the gas tank every once
a
Change preposition
in a
show examples
while
.  
Safety wise
Add a hyphen
Safety-wise
show examples
,
fuel
 would bring many drawbacks with it, whether in the gas station or
incase
Correct your spelling
in case
show examples
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
any
Correct determiner usage
an
show examples
 unfortunate accident, at the same time,
electricity
 can
introduce
Verb problem
play
show examples
 a positive role regarding
this
 aspect.  
A recent
Remove the article
Recent
show examples
 research
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 been done to compare
between
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the two
cars
 in the field of providing better qualities,
this
 research
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 shown marvellous results for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
electric vehicles.   Electrical transportation should for sure be the next step and
thus
 replacing the
fuel dependant
Correct your spelling
fuel-dependent
show examples
 ones.
Submitted by violettahajod on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fossil fuels
  • emissions
  • air pollution
  • greenhouse gases
  • climate change
  • sustainable
  • renewable
  • electric vehicles
  • battery technology
  • charging infrastructure
  • range anxiety
  • government support
  • incentives
  • subsidies
  • renewable energy
  • environmental impact
  • energy efficiency
What to do next:
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