These days many children spend a lot of their time playing computer games but little time doing sports. Why is this? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#children #time #computer #games #sports #development

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In the age of information and technology, children’s leisure pursuits are predominantly associated with

computer

Use synonyms

games rather than sporting activities.

This

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fundamental phenomenon, in my opinion, is detrimental to children and can be attributed to a few reasons. There are two factors that might explain why children prefer playing video games to doing sports.

To begin

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with, young adolescents are being prematurely introduced to

computer

Use synonyms

games. Most youngsters in the modern world are indulging in everything virtual-related.

Therefore

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, it has formed a habit of playing computerized games among children as a

favorite

something regarded with special favor or liking

favourite

type of entertainment compared to sports.

Moreover

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, the lack of encouragement to play sports

also

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contributes to children’s preference for electronic games. Many parents nowadays are quite busy with their heavy workload and

hence

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neglectful of their children’s physical development.

As a result

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, young kids are often forced to seek for alternative recreational activities other than sports, and

computer

Use synonyms

games reigns supreme thanks to their accessibility. Given the prevalence of

computer

Use synonyms

games among children, it is crucial for us to acknowledge age take up the habit of

overconsuming

Suggestion

video games, it may likely lead to a sedentary lifestyle and various

type

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types

of health risks. Fatal diseases

such

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as obesity or diabetes would be common since

enjoying

Suggestion

enjoyed

a captivating action-packed computerized game is

also

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synonymous with hours of being physically inactive on end.

Furthermore

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, children’s social life could be critically affected because they spend a considerable amount of time online

instead

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of communicating with real people.

Therefore

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, their social skills are not cultivated properly to adapt

with

Suggestion

any actual situation that involve

human’s

Suggestion

human

interaction. In conclusion, the increasing popularity of video games among children over sports can be attributed to

parents’ premature introduction

Suggestion

the parents’ premature introduction

computer

Use synonyms

and their insufficient support towards sporting activities. In the long run,

this

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will have negative effects towards these young kids’ health condition and damage their social life.

Submitted by huynhkhoa2804 on Tue Feb 04 2020

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for instance
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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

313 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

allure
captivate
supervise
accessible
scarcity
safer alternative
peer pressure
educational tools
cognitive skills
implications
obesity
poor posture
hand-eye coordination
problem-solving abilities

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These days many children spend a lot of their time playing computer games but little time doing sports. Why is this? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many people choose to travel abroad to learn a foreign language instead of studying in their home town . What are the advantages and disadvantages of this ?

Some cities create housing areas by providing taller buildings. Others create housing by building houses on a wider area of land. What solution is better?

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages.If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and if so, how?

In some countries, an increasing number of children are overweight or obese as a result of eating too much fast food. Banning fast food from school canteens is the best way to fight this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that teenagers should study all school subjects. Others argue that they should focus on only the subjects that they are good at or find most interesting. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.