IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The media pay too much attention to the lives and relationships of celebrities such as actors, singers or footballers. They should spend more time reporting the lives of ordinary people instead. To what extend do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#media #attention #lives #relationships #celebrities #actors #singers #footballers #time #people
We are exposed to media all day long since we use our smart phone a lot. Gossip of celebrities has been always a big content on the media because it attracts many attentions. It is true some makes us curious about them.
On the other hand
, we sometimes feel like we are bombarded by the stories. We are tired to know everything. I agree that the media should spend time more on ordinary lives. Because it's ourselves, who face many problems. A company made a racist commercial film. I was angry and sad. Others felt shame, too. So we gathered together to complain it. Our demonstration was in a newspaper, but it didn't get a big attention while tv stars' fashion was becoming a huge topic in the media. In the end, we didn't have any apology from the company and they didn't remove their advertisement. To conclude, we have a right to talk about our problems and it needs to have a spotlight. We have enough of gossips on the media and they've already consumed a lot. It's time to discuss our lives.
Submitted by sorryimperfect on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: