In some countries people of all ages place extra emphasis on sports and exercising. Do you think it is a positive development? Give your opinion and relevant examples from your own experience.

There is no iota of doubt that, people today are very careful about their health and career, so
they
of them or themselves
their
emphasis on sports and
exercise
.
this
Suggestion
This
phenomenon is offering multifarious benefits to people of all ages.
however
Suggestion
However
, sometimes a couple of
problem
Suggestion
problems
emerges
Suggestion
emerge
due to the same. In my opinion, it is a positive development in some extent, beyond
this
it can be negative. The following paragraphs would shed light on
pros
Suggestion
the pros
and cons of
this
trend.
To begin
with the bright side,
first
, doing extra effort on sports and
exercise
we can produce more athletes.
Therefore
, these athletes can bring more pride for our nation.
For example
,
recent survey
Suggestion
a recent survey
recent surveys
says that, in Australia players who put more emphasis on their own field bring gold medals
on
Suggestion
at
Olympic.
As a result
, by putting more effort people can achieve their own goals in the field of sports.
In addition
, due to sedentary jobs and lack of physical activities, people are suffering from obesity.
hence
(used to introduce a logical conclusion) from that fact or reason or as a result
Hence
, with regular
exercise
and sports they can easily overcome
this
problem.
Moreover
, these activities can make people
more socialize and
Suggestion
socialize more and
friendly
Suggestion
friendlier
.
so
to a very great extent or degree
So
, people can make and meet more friends due to these activities. On the flip side of the coin, there are a handful of nasty consequences as well.
Firstly
, to give extra importance in sports and
exercise
will affect one's social, personal as well as corporate life.
this
Suggestion
This
means, a person can feel alone when he is away from their family.
For instance
, cricket player playing foreign tours
have
Suggestion
has
to stay months away from their home,
this
can feel them lonely and sometimes affect their performance.
it
Suggestion
It
can steer him into the stage of depression and might cause harm to his life.
Furthermore
, these activities require a plethora of physical strength to play effectively with other teams and everybody is not strong enough for those.
this
Suggestion
This
may
further
de-motivate individuals and they may decide not to take part in challenging competitions. In conclusion, I personally believe that the de-merit
outweigh
Suggestion
outweighs
merits,
however
,
effort
Suggestion
an effort
should be made to minimize the latter one.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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