IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #parents #children #part #group #activities #time
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is of great importance that one gathers
knowledge
Use synonyms
 and guidance as a
child
Use synonyms
 from
there
of them or themselves
their
 parents or their immediate environment. Some are of the believe that getting encouragement from parents help a
child
Use synonyms
 do better because the ideology is that the
child
Use synonyms
 can learn from their parents who must have
first
Linking Words
 hand
knowledge
Use synonyms
 in some areas of life.
For instance
Linking Words
 a parent who is knowledgeable in
sport
Suggestion
the sport
, say tennis can help his or her
child
Use synonyms
 do better in that same sport. On the one hand, it is
some times
on certain occasions or in certain cases but not always
sometimes
 better to allow the
child
Use synonyms
learn
Suggestion
to learn
 and use his discretion in learning and gaining
knowledge
Use synonyms
. Allowing a
child
Use synonyms
 learn
on
Suggestion
about
 his or her own help them make mistakes that help them become better, it equally enhances their
creativity
Suggestion
creative
 ability and
also
Linking Words
 helps them take up responsibilities, face them squarely in other for growth and development to occur.
For example
Linking Words
 a
child
Use synonyms
 might show interest in cooking, he or she might take up practical steps in Preparing a meal that may turn out tasteless at
Linking Words
first but
Accept comma addition
first, but
 with time improve and do better. In conclusion, I am of the opinion that having parental guidance goes a long way to make learning and
knowledge
Use synonyms
 acquisition more fun and less stressful for the
child
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • occupied
  • organized
  • group activities
  • benefits
  • social
  • teamwork skills
  • interpersonal skills
  • friendship
  • discipline
  • time management
  • interests
  • hobbies
  • independent play
  • creativity
  • problem-solving skills
  • self-reliance
  • explore
  • discover
What to do next:
Look at other essays: