IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Many countries use fossil fuels such as coal or oil as the main sources of energy. However, in some countries the use of alternative sources of energy is encouraged. Do you think this a positive or negative development?

#countries #fuels #oil #sources #energy #alternative #development
Nowadays in
Accept comma addition
Nowadays, in
 most countries, primary sources of
energy
 are fossil fuels
such
 as coal, petrol, and oil, but some other countries are promoting to
use
 renewable sources of
energy
. I think it is a positive development for a nation because it has many benefits as compared to non-renewable resources. On the one hand, fossil fuels, the present source of
energy
, not only creates pollution but
also
 are being fast exhausted. Due to the increased air pollution level, it causes numerous health problems. Carbon emission which is caused by burning fossil fuels is the main contributor
for
Suggestion
to
 global warming.
Besides
, in many parts of the world, it leads to the degradation of the environment.
Also
, these sources of
energy
takes
Suggestion
take
 longer
time to reproduce in
Suggestion
time to reproduce
 nature.
Therefore
, countries should invest less in these resources.
On the other hand
, several developed countries boost the
use
 of other sources of
energy
such
 as wind and solar power. If an alternative source of
energy
 used in a large proportion in many sectors
such
 as transport and industry, it will greatly reduce the pollution level. These sources are almost unlimited which can be used again and
again which
Accept comma addition
again, which
 could manage to meet the demand of
growing population
Suggestion
a growing population
the growing population
.
Moreover
, renewable sources are economical to
use
 and
this
 helps to improve the economy as a whole.
Hence
, governments ought to create awareness among people to
use
 them as much as possible. In conclusion,
this
 essay supports that the alternative sources of
energy
must be encourage
Suggestion
must encourage
must be encouraged
 to
use
 over fossil fuels as these sources are
ecofriendly
 and available in abundance on earth.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • renewable energy
  • solar power
  • wind energy
  • hydroelectricity
  • geothermal
  • biomass
  • sustainability
  • fossil fuels
  • greenhouse gases
  • carbon footprint
  • sustainable development
  • energy efficiency
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • ecosystems
  • natural resources
  • energy consumption
  • carbon emissions
  • environmental degradation
  • technological advancements
What to do next:
Look at other essays: