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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

What are the positives and negatives of playing computer games on children?

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It is observed that these days children start playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games at the age of 4. So, does it have
positive or negative imapact
Suggestion
a positive or negative impact
positive or negative impact
positive or negative impacts
? Well,
computer
Use synonyms
 games can have advantages as well as disadvantages.
This
Linking Words
 essay will state positives and negatives of playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games. While some children benefit from playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games, others might adapt the negatives of it. Playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games develop the analytical ability of children by analysing various situations and acting upon it to move forward in the game. Children increase their concentration while playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games. In games like car race,
player
Suggestion
the player
a player
 has to concentrate on other player moves maintaining own speed and strategy which
also
Linking Words
 incorporate multi-tasking capability in them. In multi-player games, children increase their
communicaton
the activity of communicating; the activity of conveying information
communication
 skills and become sociable. The most loved and played online game PUBG which gained a lot of popularity is a great example of connecting varied communities to each other.
Moreover
Linking Words
, children become a good team player when playing
such
Linking Words
 games.
Although
Linking Words
 there are a lot of
advantanges
the quality of having a superior or more favorable position
advantages
 of playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games, there are harmful effects that need consideration.
Computer
Use synonyms
 games can become addictive to some children who end up spending all their time in playing games with less or even no study at all.
This
Linking Words
 leads to low performance of children in their academics and they lose on important information required to shape their future. Outdoor games are less played by children more into
computer
Use synonyms
 games which impacts health of children making them obese and less active.
Also
Linking Words
, child brain
developmenent
act of improving by expanding or enlarging or refining
development
 is
effected
acted upon; influenced
affected
adversly
in an adverse manner
adversely
 by playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games.
Computer
Use synonyms
 games as illustrated above have good and bad effects on children.I would like to highlight that it is important for children to have balance between playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games and other modes of play both indoor and outdoor. Parents should help their children to use their time
effectively which
Accept comma addition
effectively, which
help
Suggestion
helps
 them to grow in
future
Suggestion
the future
 and have
better lifestyle
Suggestion
a better lifestyle
.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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