IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#minutes #topic #country #health #service #treatments
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Health
 is always important for us. Money without
health
 is not at all important.
Therefore people
Accept comma addition
Therefore, people
 always worried about the
health
 services. People who are rich, use private hospitals even if it is more expensive. On
other hand
Suggestion
the other hand
, Government
health
 systems are the one and only place where
common man
Suggestion
the common man
 could visit. Every country should have a free
health
services
Suggestion
service
. Some
says
Suggestion
say
 that even if
this
 mean that the latest treatments may not be available through the
service
 because they are too expensive. As far as I am concerned, I do not agree with
this
 opinion.
To begin
,
Wether
introduces two alternatives
whether
wither
weather
 the
lastest
up to the immediate present; most recent or most up-to-date
latest
 medical treatment is expensive or not It is the government duty to ensure free
health
service
 to the citizen.
Government
Suggestion
The government
 is taxing us for each and everything. It is said to be for the well being of people. Government hospitals should have all the latest facilities and medical treatment. They should give it
free
Suggestion
freely
.
For example
, if we go through the new policies
implimented
forced or compelled or put in force
implemented
 by Delhi Government we could see that they are giving free medical treatment for all.
This
 includes the latest treatments
also
.
Furthermore
, most of the government hospitals are not meeting enough standards. It is because of the private hospital influence in local politics and administration.
Medical
Suggestion
Medicine
 companies are cheating people and making money. For an instance, studies and researches stating that
actual cost
Suggestion
the actual cost
 of medicines for cancer is less than USD 10 – 20. Medical firms sell it for 1000 to 2000 percentage profit.
Government
Suggestion
The government
 should control all the drug activities itself rather than depending on private
medicine
Suggestion
medical
 companies. To summarize,
government
Suggestion
the government
 should improve the
standareds
a basis for comparison; a reference point against which other things can be evaluated
standards
standard
 of all public
health
 services and provide free
medinces
the branches of medical science that deal with nonsurgical techniques
medicines
 through
health
service
 outlets. All kinds of private
inflences
a power to affect persons or events especially power based on prestige etc
influences
influence
 should be neglected and corrupt officers in public
health
service
 should be removed from their
service
 without any delays. So that our people can enjoy free
health
 services including latest treatments.
Submitted by multitaskingaccnts on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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