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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well‐educated today. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#children #time #television #book #tool #well‐educated
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In
this
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 era of technological boom, television is considered to be a good method of children’s education.
However
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, while some people feel that media could be the best way of teaching for children, I firmly believe that tangible documents are irreplaceable no matter what
gerenation
all the people living at the same time or of approximately the same age
generation
 they belong to It is clear that the benefits of television as a learning tool are undeniable. The most significant advantage is that it could bring instant knowledge with a great variety of
information
Use synonyms
 around the world. There are more than 100 alternative channels to switch from using just only a click
in
Suggestion
on
 a
TV
Use synonyms
 connected with national cable.
For example
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, children could watch the whole shows of the IELTS preparation on educational channels after finishing a documentary of wild habitats broadcasted on Geography ones. The
second
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 benefit is that
information
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 showed on
TV
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 is displayed in motion which can be helpful for their imagination. While children are considered to be the most imaginative generation, moving activities would put an unforgettable
memories
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memory
 in their brains.
Therefore
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, when mentioning a show which attracts their attention children could give out the complete story and
information
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of
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on
 that show without any
hestitation
indecision in speech or action
hesitation
.
However
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, I am convinced that
book
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the book
 will be much more conductive to other people in term of learning tool for children.
Firstly
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, while watching
TV
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 could create
distraction
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a distraction
 by media advertisements and
unfavorable
not encouraging or approving or pleasing
unfavourable
information
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, reading books could focus on one topic without any disturbing activities. Due to the fact that most books contain one subject at the time or
information
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 relating to that topic, children could acquire the complete
information
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 of that specific affair.
For instance
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, history publication can help student take up new knowledge about surrounding factors
such
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 as
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
 and character of leaders and social background which could lead to important decisions and events in the past.
Secondly
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, spending too much time on
TV
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 can be considered to be a detrimental activity for children’s development especially their physical vision. It is scientific result that the over – exposed to the light of
TV
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 and computers is the most significant reason of visual impair especially for children. While there are plenty of commercial shows which attracts their
attention
Accept comma addition
attention, such
such
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 as cartoons or animated shows, they could not quit television unless there is a strict control of how many hours they can use for watching
TV
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.
However
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; spending more time on reading books in proper condition has little impacts
for
Suggestion
of
 their health. In conclusion,
although
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 there is no doubt that
TV
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 will be beneficial to children as a learning tool in certain ways, from my perspective books is likely to make more contribution to their education.
Submitted by lhvuong1998 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Educational tool
  • Documentaries
  • Passive consumption
  • Critical thinking
  • Imagination
  • Attention span
  • Literacy skills
  • Screen time
  • Parental guidance
  • Digital materials
  • Interactive learning
  • Multimedia resources
  • Cognitive development
  • Reading comprehension
  • Balanced approach
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