Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well‐educated today. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Television
became one of the major entertainment in children's life. In recent
time
most of the kids spend a lot of
time
in front of the TV's, even though video telecasting cannot
supercede
take the place or move into the position of
supersede
the books as
a
Suggestion
an
education
Suggestion
educational
devices
Suggestion
device
. Because of which majority of parents think that, teenagers are not able to do well in their studies due to spending most of their
time
in front of
TV
Suggestion
the TV
or video games rather than
infront
Suggestion
in front
of books.
This
essay
going
Suggestion
is going
goes
to argue why
television
could be an important machine in the juvenile stage. Parents
also
have a concern regarding their kids wasting valuable
time
infront
Suggestion
in front
of
television
, which is hampering their studies. Main reason could be kids always get attracted towards cartoons,
videos
Suggestion
video
games and other series which we get on regular bases. By the survey conducted by
harvard
American philanthropist who left his library and half his estate to the Massachusetts college that now bears his name (1607-1638)
Harvard
university proved that 99% of teenagers like playing videos or watching cartoons
has been increased
Suggestion
has been increasing
day by day, because of their attraction towards them and performing less in their studies. These few instances which made parents to bother more on their studies by which parents have stopped opting for dish connections. Despite of
few risks
Suggestion
the few risks
of youth wasting
time
infront
Suggestion
in front
of
television
, the logic behind is that they get relaxed by spending
time
infront
Suggestion
in front
of
television
since, they can concentrate more on their studies. After start going to school, studying for long hours, carry
heavy load
Suggestion
a heavy load
of books, which always stress the juveniles, with which they face more mental and physical burden. In order to surpass their stress conditions kids like to relax while watching broadcastings. As per the survey, relaxed and less stressful kids perform well in exams than the kids who are
been
the state or fact of existing
being
stressed to spend more
time
on studies than encouraging them to be in other activities like watching or playing.
This
essay argued that most of the parents are
aganist
in contact with
against
kids, since they spoiling their
time
in front of
television
. In my
opinion I
Accept comma addition
opinion, I
extremely
disgree
be of different opinions
disagree
with that, as justified by saying, allow children to relax in the way they like with which they can concentrate more on studies, whereas it always gives them better space and peaceful mind in order to
acheive
to gain with effort
achieve
their results.
Submitted by sanjay.niky on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Educational tool
  • Documentaries
  • Passive consumption
  • Critical thinking
  • Imagination
  • Attention span
  • Literacy skills
  • Screen time
  • Parental guidance
  • Digital materials
  • Interactive learning
  • Multimedia resources
  • Cognitive development
  • Reading comprehension
  • Balanced approach
What to do next:
Look at other essays: