Coins and paper money will soon be replaced by credit and bank cards. Eventually we will have a cashless society which will be safer and more convenient for everyone. Do you agree or disagree

People used to

transaction

Replace the word

transact

show examples

product

Fix the agreement mistake

products

show examples

in the early

decade

Fix the agreement mistake

decades

show examples

Then

Linking Words

the money appears and

change

Correct subject-verb agreement

changes

show examples

the way of treatment. Cash money makes the transfer faster and easier. In my

opinion

Add a comma

opinion,

show examples

the huge development in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

technology will change the equation again

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

the created card will be a substitute for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

cash.

Nowadays

Punctuation problem

Nowadays,

show examples

the word

becomes

Wrong verb form

has become

show examples

a small village.

For example

Linking Words

, one small product may

produce

Wrong verb form

be produced

show examples

in more than one country, and sold overseas, capital will be exchanged through the banks to pay for it in a fast and safe way. There are several benefits of moving to cashless,

Linking Words

firstly

Punctuation problem

firstly,

show examples

the papers and coins

not

Verb problem

are not

show examples

only dirty, but

also

Linking Words

careening

Verb problem

carry

show examples

a lot of

disease

Fix the agreement mistake

diseases

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

, which

effect

Use the right word

affects

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the health of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society. What is

Add a comma

more,

show examples

crime will drop dramatically when people

become not carrying

Verb problem

no longer carry

show examples

a lot of cash in their

pocket

Fix the agreement mistake

pockets

show examples

. Printing the papers

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

very expensive and

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

Correct article usage

an advance

show examples

advance

Replace the word

advanced

show examples

process to

make sure

Verb problem

ensure

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

cannot

Verb problem

be counterfeit

show examples

counterfeit

Replace the word

counterfeited

show examples

damage

Replace the word

damaged

show examples

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

Linking Words

consequently

Add a comma

consequently,

show examples

this

Linking Words

budget will be less.

Although

Linking Words

electronic crime

becomes

Verb problem

poses

show examples

a real threat to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

transactions,

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

wise security

will

Verb problem

measures can

show examples

eliminate the risk. So the awareness of how to use

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

the created card and how

making

Wrong verb form

to make

show examples

a strong password should be rising. Another issue

faces

Verb problem

apply

show examples

people

Verb problem

face is

show examples

that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

they

become

Verb problem

apply

show examples

spend more than they actually have

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

they have a lot of

debit

Use the right word

debt

show examples

in their

account

Fix the agreement mistake

accounts

show examples

Punctuation problem

. To

show examples

overcome

this

Linking Words

issue

Punctuation problem

issue,

show examples

banks should define limits

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

accounts.

Linking Words

Finally

Add a comma

Finally,

show examples

there should be

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

strict laws and the

roles

Fix the agreement mistake

role

show examples

of the government that

handled

Wrong verb form

handles

show examples

the process of electronic exchange. In conclusion,

cashless

Correct article usage

a cashless

show examples

society will become a reality in the near

futures

Fix the agreement mistake

future

show examples

, and will make

Correct article usage

the word

show examples

word

Use the right word

world

show examples

better

Correct article usage

a better

show examples

place for living. Countries

how

Correct word choice

that

show examples

adopted

Wrong verb form

adopt

show examples

this

Linking Words

technology first will guarantee to be in the first line.

esraa5babiker

Feb 20, 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task

State your position clearly at the start.

structure

Make each paragraph focus on one main idea and add a clear example.

coherence

Use simple linking words to show order and contrast, like first, also, but, however.

grammar

Fix grammar: check use of articles, plurals, and verbs; end sentences with a full stop.

vocabulary

Keep words from the top common list; limit hard words.

idea

You show a clear view that cashless money may come.

content

You mention good points like safety, speed, and crime issues.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
63
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

293 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cashless
money
coins
notes
cards
bank
payment
safe
easy
fast
online
shop
pay
people
old
poor
rural
internet
device
risk
crime
hack
data
private
info
policy
mix
cash
help
teach
support
access
emergency
system
growth
cost

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Coins and paper money will soon be replaced by credit and bank cards. Eventually we will have a cashless society which will be safer and more convenient for everyone. Do you agree or disagree

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Caring of children is an important thing of the society. It is suggested that all mothers and fathers should be required to take training courses. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your opinion

The speed limit on UAE highways should be increased from one 20 km/h to 1 50 km/h. Do you agree or disagree?

There are many female students who finish degrees in science and technology courses at university, but few move into the workplace after they graduate. Why is this? What measures can be taken to encourage them into work?