Some people think that children nowadays have too much freedom. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #children #freedom

Childhood is supposed to the

worryless

Suggestion

worry less

time

of their entire life and some machines like auto cleaning robots have free children from doing housework.

However

, I think

today

Suggestion

today's

children don’t enjoy enough freedom.

Firstly

, due to the increasing competition, children

spend

Suggestion

spends

time

on study in order to achieve a better academic performance and enter

elit

a group or class of persons enjoying superior intellectual or social or economic status

elite

Eliot

universites

the body of faculty and students at a university

universities

in the future.

Nowadays many

Accept comma addition

Nowadays, many

students have to face the

mountaining

homework, and

afterschool

Suggestion

after school

, their parents are always prepared to send them to get private tutoring.

That is

why many people argue that students are busier than adults. Since most of their daily

time

are occupied

Suggestion

is occupied

by the schoolwork, children don’t have enough spare

time

to do what they want. What is even worse is that a large proportion of them are suffering sleep deprivation because they have to stay up late to finish their homework. Except that, many students cannot make many

choises

the person or thing chosen or selected

choices

cases

on their own. A great number of parents tend to choose what they believe are good for their children, and ignore what they really want.

This

issue is especially common in some East Asian

countris

a politically organized body of people under a single government

countries

like China and Korea. In these

countries some

Accept comma addition

countries, some

parents

even won’t allow

Suggestion

won’t even allow

their children to decide their majors when they apply for the

unversities

the body of faculty and students at a university

universities

, because they think that it will be difficult for their children to find jobs after graduation if they major in

subejcts

the subject matter of a conversation or discussion

subjects

like arts and literature. In conclusion,

although

some cutting-edge technologies like internet seems to give more

choises

the person or thing chosen or selected

choices

chess

to children, many of them still cannot make

fully decision

Suggestion

a full decision

full decision

the full decision

on their lives and future.

Fri Feb 28 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that children nowadays have too much freedom. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some school leavers go traveling or work for a period of time instead of going directly to university. Do you think this has more advantages, or disadvantages on their study

The threat of nuclear weapons maintains world peace. Nuclear power provides cheap and clean energy. The benefits of nuclear technology far outweigh the disadvantages.

In the age of digital communication and social media,face-to-face interactions are becoming less common.Some people think that this is decreasing people's ability to communicate well in person. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that in order to improve educational quality, we should encourage students to make comments or even criticism on their teachers, but others think it will lead to the loss of respect and discipline in the classroom. Discuss both views and give your own opinion