Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?

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Nowadays, People believe that the
art
Use synonyms
can contribute to positive change in our life.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
government
Suggestion
the government
spent a lot of money on the arts. A number of
travelers
a person who changes location
travellers
come in my country so that they will look at museums, theatres and traditional arts.
Also
Linking Words
, some arts can affect positively our children’s communications and
behaviors
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviours
. In my opinion, government should spend money for the following reasons.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
Art
Use synonyms
is
major source
Suggestion
a major source
the major source
of tourism industry in many of the countries.
For instance
Linking Words
, Mongolian traditional arts are famous across the world. Due to the fact that we have very interesting traditional music, instruments and crafts nowhere else in the world.
Consequently
Linking Words
, many tourists come to see curiosity arts that can raise
economy
Suggestion
the economy
of my country.
Secondly
Linking Words
, most of the parents are
learnt
Suggestion
learning
any
art
Use synonyms
their children. Because of the fact that if children can learn music, dance or any other arts in childhood. They will become more self-understanding, self-confident and good communication with
other
Suggestion
the other
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Children studying
art
Use synonyms
history that
help
Suggestion
helps
them to know history of
world
Suggestion
the world
. In conclusion, there are a number of reasons to say
art
Use synonyms
is an important role in our economy and education.
Therefore
Linking Words
, government must spend some money so as to
developing
Suggestion
develop
arts
Suggestion
the arts
.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • enriching society
  • promoting cultural understanding
  • development of talent
  • creative industries
  • economic benefits
  • generate revenue
  • cultural heritage
  • identity
  • prioritize spending
  • needs of the majority
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