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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays families are not as close as they used to be. What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to make families closer?

#families
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In recent years, modern families tend to be not closer anymore. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I am going to give reasons for explaining
this
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 unfortunate truth, and suggest what can be done for helping family members to have more
time
Use synonyms
 together. Nowadays, dealing with busy and pressure life, more and more people spend less
time
Use synonyms
 for their
time
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, leads to the broken of family closeness. Adults usually work all day, from early morning to midnight, provide a route to behave too formally in
family
Suggestion
the family
families
a family
 because of lacking of
time
Use synonyms
 being together.As an example, a typical family in a developed society
just spend
Suggestion
just spends
 1/15 of their
time
Use synonyms
 for family activities.
Furthermore
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, in
this
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 competitive community, it is forced that people have to work as much as they can, making
they
objective case of they
them
 too tired when return back home and just want to relax, not confiding or entertaining with their children.
As a result
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, families are
become
Suggestion
becoming
 more and more detached.
However
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, there are some solutions for
this
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 problem,
such
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 as spend less
time
Use synonyms
 for working. A research pointed out that human often wasting
time
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 in office for chatting with colleagues or cleaning their inbox. If adults can use their
time
Use synonyms
 more wisely, they will save valuable
time
Use synonyms
 for being with family.
In addition
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, aware the paramount of together
time
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 will motivate parents to be at home on
time
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, which is
benefit
Suggestion
beneficial
 for educating children, according to an adviser. Altogether, adults should spend at least 2 hours for family per day to build up a happy household. In conclusion, there are many
causes
an occurrence of something
cases
 leads to
standoffishness
Suggestion
 in modern family.
Otherwise
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, if family members recognize and acknowledge the importance of closeness, they may spend a little bit of
time
Use synonyms
 in their busy life to being together.
Submitted by linhlemyhuynh on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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