Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
At the outset of
new millennium
Suggestion
the new millennium
a new millennium
, there is a
debateable
open to doubt or debate
debatable
issue that celebrities are gaining more popularity because of their wealth and fame
instead
Linking Words
of their
perfomance
a dramatic or musical entertainment
performance
performances
.A lion's share of society favour in it and
rest
Suggestion
the rest
go averse it as they think that famous people or celebrities set a poor example for youngsters.
This
Linking Words
essay would elucidate my personal perspective along with apt epitome. I see eye to eye with the central idea that
myraids
too numerous to be counted
myriads
of people
belive
accept as true; take to be true
believe
believed
that celebrities are popular for their name and fame.There are myriads of reason,
first
Linking Words
and foremost, well known person discourage the youngsters.Famous people have huge fan following so if they
not show
Suggestion
don't show
aren't showing
any new
perfomace
a dramatic or musical entertainment
performance
perfumes
or activity still
they
objective case of they
them
popular because already they have millions of
fan
Suggestion
fans
.
Thus
Linking Words
, if
any new
Accept comma addition
any, new
person
want
Suggestion
wants
to join the
bollywood
the film industry of India
Bollywood
plywood
or entertainment
industry they
Accept comma addition
industry, they
demotivate
Suggestion
from the
first
Linking Words
stage.
Secondly
Linking Words
,masses follow
Submitted by dollykohli25 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • glamour
  • wealth
  • achievements
  • portrayed
  • overshadow
  • influenced
  • lifestyles
  • unrealistic
  • expectations
  • values
  • promoting
  • hard work
  • perseverance
  • inspire
  • positive impact
What to do next:
Look at other essays: