IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think it is better for children to grown up in the city, while others think that life in the countryside is more suitable for them. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both places?

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Nowadays
,
Accept space
,
there are a variety of controversial opinions for choosing the best accommodation in terms of nurturing children. It is sometimes argued that living in the urban areas is more appropriate compared to suburban areas.
In contrast
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, others prefer to choose rural areas as the more proper choice. There are several benefits and drawbacks are going to be mentioned in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 essay. On the one hand, many advantages based on
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

this
plural of "this"
these
 two choices exist.Children can utilize vast facilities related to advanced technologies in the urban areas. More proper conditions have been provided in the case of their education. Public transportation can assist them in order to
more convenient
Suggestion
more conveniently
transfering
transfer somebody to a different position or location of work
transferring
 during the day,
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

however more
Accept comma addition
however, more
 security and lower daily expenditure
are
Suggestion
is
 some remarkable great points of
suburbans
Suggestion
Suburbans
. The lower population leads to unpolluted air and
more healthy
Suggestion
healthier
life styles
a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes
lifestyles
.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, massive populace and polluted air conditions are the handicaps of bringing up in the cities.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, high
expences
amounts paid for goods and services that may be currently tax deductible (as opposed to capital expenditures)
expenses
experiences
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 result from it
,
Accept space
,
while
transfering
transfer somebody to a different position or location of work
transferring
 is extremely harder due to the lack of public transport in the country sides.
Furthermore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the absence of some tutorial resources should be considered as the other drawbacks. In conclusion, despite the fact that living in and out of
city
Suggestion
the city
 has various
possitive
characterized by or displaying affirmation or acceptance or certainty etc.
positive
 and negative
effect
Suggestion
effects
 on nurturing kids, various
facilites
a building or place that provides a particular service or is used for a particular industry
facilities
faculties
 and high quality educations
conditins
the prevailing context that influences the performance or the outcome of a process
conditions
 in the cities outperform the low life budget requirement and more healthy environment of suburban areas.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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