The growing number of obese people is putting strain on the healthcare system.Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in school curriculum. To what extent you are agree or disagree?

Obese people are increasing at a faster rate putting stress on the health care system
Accept comma addition
so, according
so according
to some sports and exercise ought to be taught in a focussed way in the
school
to deal with
this
issue. In my opinion, I agree that introducing physical education subjects in the
school
is the best method to deal with the menace of obesity from its root.
Firstly
, introduction of sports and exercise from
school
Suggestion
level to engage
level engage
children in the
first
step of the healthy
a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes
lifestyle
life style
. Due to early level exposure, children would develop a habit of playing sports.
This
would give tremendous benefits of sports related activities like fit body,
cooperative work done by a team (especially when it is effective)
teamwork
team work
, sportsmanship etc.
Moreover
, healthy children would make
Suggestion
a healthier society
healthier
society
. Due to engagement of children in the sports related activity, it is more likely that parents would
also
participate in
such
activities.
Suggestion
During
In
a long run, it will be beneficial for the whole
society
. Healthy
society
would definitely put less strain on a country’s
Suggestion
health care
healthcare
system and save lots of money that would be invested in other important sector.
For example
, Denmark has reduced half of its health care system budget in the
last
ten years by introducing sports compulsion in the curriculum.
Furthermore
, by following
this
long term approach it will surely
Suggestion
benefit
benefited
to the whole
society
in a long run as healthy body carries healthy mind. Healthy body and mind give healthy citizens who lead
Suggestion
the country
country
in the all
Suggestion
fronts
front
and contribute in the progress of a country. In conclusion, addition of physical education at
school
level is the best and long term approach to fight the menace of obesity. It will bless citizens with good health and ultimately benefit to the
society
.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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