Some people think that government is wasting money on the arts, and that this money could be spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, people believe that
arts
Suggestion
the arts
can contribute to positive changes in our life.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the government tends to be spending much money on them. Many
travelers
a person who changes location
travellers
come to my country so that they will visit museums, theatres and traditional attractions.
Also
Linking Words
, some artistic things influence positively toward children in any ways,
such
Linking Words
as communications and
behaviors
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviours
. In my opinion, the authorities should invest more money for the following reasons.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the arts are the main parts of the tourism industry in many countries.
For instance
Linking Words
, Mongolian folklore is famous across the world because Mongolians have very interesting traditional music, instruments and crafts that can be found nowhere else in the world.
Consequently
Linking Words
, many tourists come to see curios arts that can raise our country’s economy.
Secondly
Linking Words
, most of the children are being learnt art by their parents’ request. If children can learn traditional music, folk or any other arts in childhood, they will become more confident in themselves and competent communicating with others.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Children are studying the history of the arts that helps them to know about the history of the world. In conclusion, there are a number of reasons to say the arts play an important role in our economy and education.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the government needs to expend some money on artists so as to develop the arts.
Submitted by nandintsetseg on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • enriching society
  • promoting cultural understanding
  • development of talent
  • creative industries
  • economic benefits
  • generate revenue
  • cultural heritage
  • identity
  • prioritize spending
  • needs of the majority
What to do next:
Look at other essays: