Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.
As
the development of Change preposition
With
the
modern society, there Correct article usage
apply
are
increasing Change the verb form
is
health
problem
in our general population. In order to foster public Fix the agreement mistake
problems
health
, some people
claims
to increase the Change the verb form
claim
amount
of Change the quantifier
number
sport
Change the noun form
sports
facilities
, while
others believing
in different measures.
It goes without saying that the best way to improve body Wrong verb form
believe
health
is taking exercise. According to
a plethora of doctors and researchers, they all agree that taking exercise can strengthen our body's immune system and reduce the possibility of getting obesity and others
Correct quantifier usage
other
health
issues. Take myself as an example, I used to stay at home playing video games all day long, and I got sick easily at that time. However
, since the sport
centre was built near Change the noun form
sports
by
my house, I often went there for swimming and jogging. Gradually, I started to maintain the habit of exercising, and my Change preposition
apply
health
problem has disappeared.
On the other hand
, it is not that easy for people
to use the sport
Change the noun form
sports
facilities
spontaneously. Otherwise
, those facilities
would become a waste for the entire society. Therefore
, we should also
try other measures to improve the
public Correct article usage
apply
health
at the same time. For instance
, high-tax
for those fast food restaurants, encouraging Correct your spelling
high
people
riding
Change the verb form
to ride
bike
Fix the agreement mistake
bikes
instead
of driving for short distance
, or Fix the agreement mistake
distances
provide
Wrong verb form
providing
health
management classes for people
who needed
.
Wrong verb form
need them
To sum up
, it will be too narrow if we only focus on building more sport
Change the noun form
sports
facilities
than other various solutions. We should encourage people
not only maintain
physically active but Verb problem
to remain
also
remain others
options at the same time.Correct quantifier usage
other
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Grammar
Ensure proper grammar and verb tense usage. For instance, '...some people claims...' should be 'some people claim...', '...believing in different measures.' should be '...believe in different measures.'.
Word Usage
Correct errors in word usage such as 'remain' should be 'consider' in '...also remain others options at the same time.'
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on sentence structure and coherence. 'It will be too narrow if we only focus on building more sport facilities than other various solutions.' could be improved to 'Focusing solely on building more sports facilities would be too narrow a strategy, as various other solutions should also be considered.'
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?