One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

"As is commonly believed, medical
care its
Accept comma addition
care, its
only a job for the doctors and therapists, while the common person
itself
the thing named or in question
it
can take
care
with preventions and researching information towards general
health
, as methods to improve the calm, reducing stress or anxiety, mental
health
, physical
health
, and others. Medical
care
is changing towards the increase in life expectancy, becoming an advantage for the medical users, but
also
for the doctors themselves and the medical
system
.
For Example
, when a common medical user goes to a hospital for their services,
its
it is
it's
helping the hospital and their facilities by giving monetary help.
However
, there's a huge percentage of resources that are being used and it represents a lot of equipment usage. When more users attend the hospital there are more patients to take
care
of, increasing the demand of resources for hospitals
aswell
Suggestion
as well
. I personally believe that medical
care
has improved over the years. I agree in the instance that life expectancy is going to increase even more over the years. If people remain looking forward their own
care
, and improving their
health lifestyle
Accept comma addition
health, lifestyle
, is going to benefit not only themselves but the medical
system
aswell
Suggestion
as well
. There are three points of view. The
first
one is that medical attention during the 19th Century where it began to be an usual service for the community, was even more demanding than it is
today
.
Furthermore
, people had a lower expectancy on medical
care
and tried to go with natural remedies that most of the times didn't even work. Or going to
churches
Suggestion
church
by those times expecting to get cured in seconds. Now,
today
in the 21st century, medical
care
has improved as not only technology has changed the
way
we live in, but
also
has changed the
way
services are given. The
second
one is that technology
also
gives a more accurate result, and helps the doctor in charge to improve his work
aswell
Suggestion
as well
. As an addition to their own knowledge, and it
also
, of course, helps to keep on improving medical
care
in general.
Last
but not least, the
third
point of view is that the new developments that will come for the future of medical attention are going to not only help the doctor and patient
way
better than
today
. But
also
is going to improve the medical
system
in
general assuring
Suggestion
general assuring healthy ways
general assuring healthy way
a general assuring healthy way
general assuring healthier way
the general assuring healthy way
health
way
different than
today
, and people
is going
Suggestion
are going
to be probably not healthier but with a better medical attention. In Conclusion, medical
care
has improved over the years, and until now it has changed to the point that people itself is taking
care
more of themselves than anything. Looking forward more ways to stay healthy by themselves and
also
trusting the medical
system
which has improved medical
care
in general by learning from their own patients, their symptoms and their needs over time. Hopefully, medical
care
will be
way
better in the future, not only because of the advance of technology but because of the
way
the medical
system
has improved itself learning
from
Suggestion
of
the principal target they aim for, which are their patients."

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • life expectancy
  • elderly population
  • health care systems
  • pension funds
  • extended family relationships
  • quality of life
  • aging population
  • economic growth
  • volunteer work
  • expertise
  • financial planning
  • retirement
  • age-related diseases
  • medical research
  • healthier lifestyles
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