Some people think that music plays an important role in society. Others think it is simply a form of entertainment. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

People have different views about whether

music

Use synonyms

is only a way of entertainment or it

also

Linking Words

plays a crucial part in humanity. In

this

Linking Words

essay, both these ideas will be examined before my perspective, which supports the former side of the argument, is given. On the one hand, the main function of

music

Use synonyms

is to provide us a relaxed and harmonious atmosphere.

Firstly

Linking Words

music

Use synonyms

is capable of changing our mood, which can alter our feelings.

As a result

Linking Words

, several use

music

Use synonyms

to reduce stress in study or at work, or a turn of phrase,

music

Use synonyms

can refresh your mind.

Secondly

Linking Words

Use synonyms

music

Suggestion

the music

is said to be in a limelight due to its ability to bring about energy. It is a fact that numerous people, find it more satisfied and enjoyable to work while listening to their favourite piece of

music

Use synonyms

therefore

Linking Words

, the productivity will properly be enhanced.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, I strongly believe that

besides

Linking Words

the entertaining, we should

also

Linking Words

emphasize the integral part of singing other fields in life.

singing

Suggestion

Singing

has a paramount importance in health and medical area. Many doctors and psychologists use rock as a therapy to treat their patients who suffer from mental problems

such

Linking Words

as depression or autism.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, there are numbers of evidences prove that some special types of piece can improve our intelligence, which one is called the Mozart effects.

Likewise

Linking Words

melody

Suggestion

the melody

makes an invaluable contribution to national culture and tradition. It is indisputable that though

pop rap

Accept comma addition

pop, rap

seems to dominate the entertainment market nowadays, it can never replace folk and traditional opera. Those types of rap not only tell stories and deliver life lessons, but they can

also

Linking Words

raise awareness to young generation.

Moreover

Linking Words

, some songs

such

Linking Words

as national anthem can evoke the compatriots and the national pride, so it cannot be considered as a form of relaxation only. In conclusion, despite its amusing function, we should consider the importance of

soul

Suggestion

the soul

in different areas in life. From my viewpoint, tune, as long as a form of language, can

also

Linking Words

have more precious meanings.

abdullahisiltiFri Mar 06 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

342 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
It is not necessary to travel to other places to learn about other cultures of other people. We can learn just as much from books, films, and the internet. Do you agree or disagree?
It is often said that travelling is no longer essential to learn about other nations' cultures and traditions, instead, people can learn about this from reading books, watching movies, and browsing the internet. In my opinion, reading books and watching documentary movies on the Internet can teach people about other cultures and traditions.
7.5
band
Many cities replace farmlands and parks with houses. Is it a positive or negative development?
It has been observed that owing to the proliferating population in the urban field, accommodation issues are arising. To overcome this, authorities convert the farms and open spaces into housing. In my opinion, it has negative consequences on the environment and mankind which will be discussed below.
7.5
band
165.Some parents say that children should play individually more than in a group. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this and include your own opinion.
Childhood is definitely the best part of one's life, and children have their imaginations. Different kids have contrasting personalities, so a few enjoy being in the company of many kids, while others love solitude. A fraction of parents prefer that their offspring should stay and relish alone. There are various benefits and drawbacks to this mindset. I will discuss both and then will eventually give my opinion.
6.5
band
Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do yu think might be effective?
The number of commuters moving to and from work has increased due to the advance in vehicles. It provides convenience and efficiency but causes traffic and pollution troubles. I totally agree that the increasing price of petrol could be a practical solution to solve the above problems.
7.5
band
In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. Minimum 250 words
In some nations, college students stay with their families while they study, whereas in others, they move to another place to take their classes. There are numerous advantages and downsidesof living away from home, but I believe the benefits outweigh the drawbacks for a brighter future.

Some people think that music plays an important role in society. Others think it is simply a form of entertainment. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

It is not necessary to travel to other places to learn about other cultures of other people. We can learn just as much from books, films, and the internet. Do you agree or disagree?

Many cities replace farmlands and parks with houses. Is it a positive or negative development?

165.Some parents say that children should play individually more than in a group. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this and include your own opinion.

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do yu think might be effective?