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Writing Samples /
Band 4

Wealth does not necessarily guarantee happiness. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Provide reasons for your answer. Include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#wealth #guarantee #happiness
Some people think that possession of
money
 does not guarantee of
happiness
.I completely agree with the given statement because there are several other factors
such
 as good health and family relations which are responsible to keep a
person
 happy. To commence with
,
Accept space
,
there are many reasons to go in favour of
given
Suggestion
giving
statement
Suggestion
a statement
.
Firstly
,
Accept space
,
health is a crucial factor to be a happy
person
 in
life
.
For example
,
Accept space
,
a
billoioniare
a very rich person whose material wealth is valued at more than a billion dollars
billionaire
 cannot enjoy his
life
 if he is
suffereing
a state of acute pain
suffering
 with
serious health issue
Suggestion
serious health issues
a serious health issue
,
Accept space
,
such
 as cancer and his wealth cannot save him.
Secondly
,
money
 looks worthless in those families where there is no cordial relation exists between family members.
In other words
,
Accept space
,
No
money
 can reduce the stress between their relations.
Also
, a
person
 can enjoy his
life
 to the fullest only if they have moral support from their relatives.Recent research has shown that the divorce rates are very low in poor families as compared to rich
family which
Accept comma addition
family, which
 means
money
doesnot
Suggestion
does not
 play any role to keep married couple happy.
on
Suggestion
On
 the other hand, Some
peple
(plural) any group of human beings (men or women or children) collectively
people
belive
accept as true; take to be true
believe
believes
money
 is directly linked to
happiness
 because they can buy all the luxuries of
life
 with
money
 only.
However
, they are not aware
from
Suggestion
of
 the fact that
money
 can give us temporary
happiness
 by feeding our materialistic deeds
.
Accept space
.
In contrast
,
happiness
 originates from
soul
Suggestion
the soul
 and its effects are long lasting
.
Accept space
.
 In conclusion
,
Accept space
,
happiness
 does not come with
money
. I agree with
this
 because many others important factors are responsible to keep
person
Suggestion
people
a person
the person
happy
Suggestion
happier
 rather than only having
money
.
Submitted by bhawnaj7 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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