IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Being a celebrity can bring benefits and problems at the same time. To what extent do you agree on this statement?

#celebrity #time
Everyone has a desire to become famous when he or she sees people of his profession getting success. It makes him feel that
life
 of renewed individual is lavish. But, it has some problems
also
 I fully agree with
this
 viewpoint. It is true by becoming a famous person gets the source of earning. Sportsmen are offered many
advertisement
Suggestion
advertisements
 become additional income.
For instance
,
annual income
Suggestion
the annual income
 of Mr
virat
Suggestion
Virat
kohli
Suggestion
Kohli
 is 200crore by endorsement of different product by Hindustan times.
In addition
 actor's are invited at the opening of showroom, Mall and restaurants.
Hence
, being
celebrity
 gives financial support.
On the other hand
, every argument has two sides. There
are
Suggestion
is
 some problem
associated being a
Suggestion
associated with being a
 famous person. Privacy is right of everyone which almost ended. Media tries to cover each and every detail of
celebrity
 like where they go, what is eaten by them and who dates whom. It irritates the person.
Moreover
, the problem of depression of not being
success
Suggestion
successful
 speciality in actor's forces them to take
wrong step
Suggestion
a wrong step
the wrong step
wrong steps
. Suicide is considered to be a only of the problem. Overall,
life
 being a
celebrity
 is not easy. In conclusion, mony and success is not found in the
life
 of
celebrity
 only it depend on human how
life
 is lived by him
Submitted by shubhsharma44015 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: