The bar chart below shows the percentage of students who passed their high school competency exams, by subject and gender, during the period 2010-2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the percentage of students who passed their high school competency exams, by subject and gender, during the period 2010-2011.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The graph illustrates the percentages of
boys
and
girls
who were successful in their high school competency exams in the period from 2010 to 2011, by subject.
Overall
, students of both sexes performed best in Computer Science, Mathematics, and Foreign Languages, including French, German and Spanish. Results for
boys
and
girls
were roughly comparable the same in Computer Science and Mathematics. In other subjects,
however
, there were some significant differences.
Girls
achieved by far their best results in Computer Science, with a pass rate of 56.3%, which was considerably
higheraround
Correct your spelling
higher around
14% higher than the
boys
. The difference was even greater / more marked in Chemistry, where over 16% / more than 16% more
girls
passed. The only / The one /
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
single subject where
boys
’ results were better than
girls
was Geography where they achieved a pass rate of 30.4%, which was 10% higher than that / the figure / the percentage / the pass rate / the result for
girls
. In general, we can say / we can see / the statistics show that during the period in
question
Add a comma
,question
show examples
girls
performed better in most subjects in the competency exams than
boys
.
Submitted by jauraguriairtel on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Vocabulary: Replace the words boys, girls with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "differences" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Competency exams
  • High school
  • Pass rate
  • Disparity
  • Performance gap
  • Subject-specific analysis
  • Year-to-year progression
  • Regression
  • Overall trends
  • Significant
  • Notably wide/narrow
  • Conclusion
  • Observations
  • Consistencies
What to do next:
Look at other essays: