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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people feel that entertainers (e.g. film stars, pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of job should be highly paid?

#people #entertainers #e #g #film #stars #pop #musicians #sports #money #job
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It is often believed that celebrities in the entertainment industry
such
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 as movie star, singers or sports stars are being overpaid.
This
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 essay discusses why I think they are getting paid too much money and will describe other occupations that should be paid higher. The main reason I strongly believe that entertainers are being overpaid is because their income does not inflect the work they do.
For instance
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, A top singers like Justin Bieber can make thousands of dollars per concert.
This
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 amount is impossible for some people to reach, no matter how hard they work in their entire life.
In addition
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, If we base a person's wage, according to their contribute to society the earnings of celebrity seems too high, as entertainment is not so important to our society like other fields
such
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 as science and technology. There are others professions that deserve to get higher paid for their work. More specifically, people like doctors make a huge sacrifice to treat their patients should be rewarded more. Since doctors can save lives and give people hope, they should receive a high amount to equal their meaningful contributions. Another occupation worthy of high salaries is teachers, who have a big responsibility for contributing education to
next
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 generations. Surely people we entrust with the task should be rewarded
accordingly
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. In conclusion, I strongly believe that entertainers are overpaying as they do not offer anything greater than other people who are working in other industries. It is advocated that people who make a significant contribution to humanity,
such
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 as medical practitioners and teachers should be rewarded appropriately. I recommend that steps should be taken to address
this
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 disparity. Formatted

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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