The pie chart below shows where energy is used in a typical Australian household, and the table shows the amount of electricity used according to the number of occupants.

The pie chart below shows where energy is used in a typical Australian household, and the table shows the amount of electricity used according to the number of occupants.
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The pie chart depicts the rate of an average Australian house’s
power
Use synonyms
usage in the form of
percentage
Fix the agreement mistake
percentages
show examples
by various appliances, and the table illustrates data regarding electricity consumption (
kWh
Use synonyms
per year)
according to
Linking Words
the number of people in a household.
Overall
Linking Words
, the pie chart reveals that maximum
power
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is consumed by Heating and cooling,
while
Linking Words
the minimum by Stand-by
power
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. The table shows that generally as the amount of people living in a house increases, the
per person
Add a hyphen
per-person
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share of
power
Use synonyms
usage goes on decreasing.
Firstly
Linking Words
, in the pie chart, the highest electricity usage is taken by Heating and cooling, water heating, and other appliances (clothes and dishwashers, entertainment and small gadgets like a toaster, hairdryer and iron) accounting for just under 40%, one-quarter, and 16% respectively. Standby
power
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is the most
energy saving
Add a hyphen
energy-saving
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(least
power
Use synonyms
consumer) with a negligible 3% share.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the table demonstrates that the electric unit consumption in terms of
kWh
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per year units is proportionately declining as the
quantity
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of family members
rise
Correct subject-verb agreement
rises
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. A solo household member uses between 5000-6500
kWh
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,
whereas
Linking Words
, a large family of 6 or more consumes only 12000-16000
kWh
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, which is double
to
Change preposition
apply
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that of
2-person
Correct article usage
a 2-person
show examples
household (6000-8500
kWh
Use synonyms
).
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Vocabulary: Replace the words power, kwh with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "stand" was used 2 times.
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