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Writing Samples /
Band 7

The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying fulltime or part-time. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying fulltime or part-time. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#men #women #education #britain #three #periods #fulltime #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The graph below illustrates how many
men
 and
women
 got enrolled in
further
education
 and whether it was in part-time or full-time
education
 in Britain studied over three periods.
Overall
, what stands out is that the
number
 of
students
 studying part-time has always been much higher than the
students
Correct quantifier usage
number of students
show examples
 pursuing full-time
education
.
Furthermore
, by the
end
 of the
period
, more females got enrolled in
further
education
 than
men
. Focusing on part-time
education
, the figures for
men
 pursuing it had experienced a fluctuation,
whereas
 the numbers for
women
 had increased over the
period
 studied. At the beginning of the
period
Add a comma
,period
show examples
men
 had the highest
number
 of
students
 enrolled with 1 million
students
 enrolled in 1970/71.
However
, the figures dropped to around 8,50,000
students
 by the
end
 of the
period
.
In contrast
, the figure for
women
 had experienced growth with the
number
 of registrations increasing by 2,50,000
students
 by the
end
 of the
period
 studied.
On the other hand
, full-time
education
 was not as popular as part-time courses among
students
.
Although
 only 1,00,000
men
 and 50,000
women
 enrolled in it at the beginning, the figures rose by 50% and 75% respectively by the
end
 with an equal
number
 of
men
 and
women
 registered.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, education, number, students, end, period with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 2 times.
▼

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