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Writing Samples
Band 7

The table below describes the number of employees and factories in England and Wales from 1851 to 1901.Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below describes the number of employees and factories in England and Wales from 1851 to 1901.Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given table illustrates the figures for male and female workers, and manufacturing units in England and Wales in
10 year
Add a hyphen
10-year
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 intervals starting from 1851 to 1901.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of factory workers dropped steadily throughout the given period and males outnumbered females in most years.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
factories
Use synonyms
 saw a fluctuating trend in England and Wales. Looking at the table in more detail, there were 477,100 employees in British and Welsh
factories
Use synonyms
 in 1851.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
,However
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 by 1901,
this
Linking Words
number
Use synonyms
 had plummeted to just 61,000, registering a drop each year. In terms of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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gender distribution, men outnumbered women in all years except 1861, when there were 131,780 men as compared to 160,000 women. By 1901, the gap between the genders too had narrowed substantially (31,000 men and 30,000 women).
Finally
Linking Words
, the total
number
Use synonyms
 of
factories
Use synonyms
 showed a fluctuating trend. There were 225
factories
Use synonyms
 in Britain and Wales in 1851.
This
Linking Words
number
Use synonyms
 surged to 721 in 1881 and
then
Linking Words
 dropped to 600 by 1901.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words number, factories with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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