It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environment, such as the South Pole. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#scientists #tourists #travel #environment #pole

Nevertheless

, other benefits of scientists and tourists to ravel to

remote natural environment

Suggestion

the remote natural environment

will be far more significant.

First

, in order to achieve research goals, acquire

moreknowledge

Suggestion

more knowledge

about the natural habitat, scientists should still be encouraged to explore remote areas.

For example

, they will have more opportunities to collect samples about plants, animals and minerals, which

them

people in general

they

contribute to human developments.

Second

, if the visitors to travel to distant natural environment, they will have unique experience.

This

means that they have a

chance imerse

Suggestion

chance to immerse

chance immerse

chance immersed

chance immerses

themselve

reflexive form of "them"

themselves

into

Suggestion

nature, in lieu of them

visiting

Suggestion

is visiting

in artificial buildings, which helps them develop a

high

Suggestion

higher

appreciation for nature. In conclusion, the advantages of

this

trend will overshadow the disadvantages. By considering all the pros and cons of remote areas before arriving, tourists and scientists will

best

Suggestion

better

prepare themselves.

Submitted by vituongvyy on Wed Mar 25 2020

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

134 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environment, such as the South Pole. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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