IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

you have seen in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a family for six months and look after their six-year-old child. Write a letter to the parents. In your letter . explain why you would like the job . give details of why you would be a suitable person to employ . say how yo would spend your free time while you are in Australia

#australian #magazine #someone #six #months #child #parents #job #person #yo #time #australia
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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing here because I saw your advertisement in the magazine for a person like me, who is interested to live with an Australian family short time. If you ask me about my
aiming
Change the form of the verb
aims
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 for the job, I have to express two things which motivated me about your offered position.
First
Linking Words
 of all, the most important one, I am currently studying society and in the future
study-year
Add a comma
,study-year
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 I will start writing my thesis about the difference between family cultures and their effects on the children's personality while they are growing up. The
Linking Words
secondly
Change the adverb
second
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 point is that I'm a
foreigner
Replace the word
foreign
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 student here and struggling with language after 3
semester
Change to a plural noun
semesters
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studying
Change preposition
of studying
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in
Change preposition
at
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 University. All in all, my outgoing personality and great behaviour with children are positive things that always my friends said about me.
This
Linking Words
 summer will be a great opportunity to take time with your family and experience more about your culture and traditions. best regards jenny

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The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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