Some people think that companies should provide employees with exercise time during the day.What is your opinion about this?

In
this
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era of globalization,
exercise
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and
yoga
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is very useful for our
health
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. Some people think that companies should provide employees with
exercise
Use synonyms
time
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during the
day
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and
than
subsequently or soon afterward (often used as sentence connectors)
then
they easily fell better.
This
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essay is in agreement to the given statement and shall discuss
reasons
Suggestion
the reasons
for my support before presenting logical conclusion. Lately, in all
countries people
Accept comma addition
countries, people
doing
yoga
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and
exercise
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because they believe that
health
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is most important in our life because sometimes some people have lots of
money but
Accept comma addition
money, but
they
can’t
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have good
health
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and they always ill than, they
can’t
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use their money to buy cars, homes, and mobile phones etc. These days, companies should provide
exercise
Use synonyms
time
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during the
day
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because they
also
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fill stress and they are always doing their
work
Use synonyms
in companies than, companies should provide some
exercise
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time
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than, they
also
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feel
relax
Suggestion
relaxed
and they are always
presenting
Suggestion
present
presented
good works because their companies
are provide gym
Suggestion
are providing a gym
are providing gym
and garden so, all employees are doing
yoga
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and
exercise
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in their companies.
For example
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, in reliance
company
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, they provide gym facilities because companies manager
believe
Suggestion
believes
that if all workers are
healthy
Suggestion
healthier
more healthy
than
company
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easily complete their goals.
Moreover
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, sometimes workers are not healthy and they
can’t
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come in the
company
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than
subsequently or soon afterward (often used as sentence connectors)
then
, other workers
can’t
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complete
work
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because some workers are Ill. Than,
Use synonyms
company
Suggestion
the company
a company
companies
can’t
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reach their goals. Appropriately, if companies should provide some
exercise
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time
Use synonyms
during the
Use synonyms
day than, all
Suggestion
day, then all
day then, all
employees feel better because companies take care their workers. So, all companies should provide employees with
exercise
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time
Use synonyms
during the
Use synonyms
day than
Accept comma addition
day, then
day then
, workers are easily
reduce
Suggestion
reduced
their stress level and they feel better.
However
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, some companies suggest that, provide
exercise
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time
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is a
weast
spend thoughtlessly; throw away
waste
of working
time
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because some
time
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some
company
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have lots of
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work
Accept comma addition
work, therefore
therefore
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, their workers are doing exercises in
garden
Suggestion
a garden
the garden
and gym than,
company
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can’t
Use synonyms
complete
work
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. Sometimes provide
exercise
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
is a very bad for companies future. To conclude, provide
exercise
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
during the
day
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is
a
Suggestion
an
important for
workers
Suggestion
workers'
worker
health
Use synonyms
and it’s
also
Linking Words
useful for
companies
Suggestion
company
company's
manager because they
Linking Words
also doing
Suggestion
are also doing
also do
yoga
Use synonyms
and other exercises. After,
exercise
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workers
fell
mat together and make felt-like
felt
better and they are complete their
work
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in one or two
hours so, it’s
Suggestion
hours, so it’s
also
Linking Words
profitable for
Use synonyms
company
Suggestion
the company
companies
.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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