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Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some parents believe that cell phones are harmful to children, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#parents #cell #phones #children
Tn
Suggestion
TN
then
this
 contemporary era, technology is uprising very aspect of life
for
example mobile
Accept comma addition
example, mobile
 phone is one
such
 development. It is argued that
cell
 phones are harmful to children, while others disagree. I will discuss both views and my opinion in upcoming paragraph. To commence with, some parents so not like to give
cell
 phones to their children because children spend more time
to play
Suggestion
playing
 games, watching movies and other social media apps which is not good for their health. Children who use
cell phone
Suggestion
a cell phone
 very much daily they are physically unfit and
also
 they gain their weight as they do not do any physical exercise and they don not play any outdoor games.
Moreover
, the bond between children and parents is not good due to mobile phones as children spend their most time on
phones
Suggestion
the phones
. Children do not concentrate on their
study
Suggestion
studies
 as they use
cell
 phones and they lost their
intrest
a sense of concern with and curiosity about someone or something
interest
 in
study
Suggestion
the study
.
On the other hand
, mobile phones are very useful
device
, children get information about the world from social media apps. Nowadays, children do their
study
 on mobile phones as
their
in or at that place
there
 some topics are not available on books so they can easily search on mobile phones and continue their
study
. Moving
further
, one of the main reasons why mobile phones are good for children is that it is a safety
device
. In these days,
crime rate
Suggestion
the crime rate
 has increased all over the world. If children face any problem while going out from home they can easily inform to their parents. In my opinion, mobile phones are very useful
device
 and
also
 it considered a safety
device
. Parents should give mobile phones to their children.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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