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Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The qualities a person needs to become successful in today’s world cannot be learned at a university or similar academic institutions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#qualities #person #today’s #world #university #institutions
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I truly agree that to become a quality person is not born to be, everyone
have
Suggestion
has
 to accumulate their knowledge, life experience and
work
Use synonyms
 experience to combine a whole. A company most preferred gives opportunity to high academic or qualified person rather than secondary school graduates, they thought that someone with high qualifications would be an invisible guaranteed on their
work
Use synonyms
 efficiency and
productive which
Suggestion
productivity, which
productivity which
productively which
 may benefit to the company;
Linking Words
however more
Accept comma addition
however, more
 and more organizations nowadays discovered that human
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
 at
work
Use synonyms
 place, responsibilities and self-discipline are
another
not the same one or ones already mentioned or implied
other
 topics that cannot
learned
Suggestion
learn
 from university,
therefore
Linking Words
 the management will organize different team spirit trainings for their employee to participate. On the job training or team spirit course will refresh the working team to understand their advantages and disadvantages, how to review and improve their technique, confidence and social skills. On the training session, staff will have
chance
Suggestion
a chance
the chance
 to know more about their co-workers which they may not connect very often during
work
Use synonyms
, it will improve their relationship and
work
Use synonyms
 atmosphere. Universities begin to realize that complex learning syllabus covering academic and social studies would be the key element of future success for students.
However
Linking Words
, different from the academic knowledge, social skill or self-confidence is hard to learn from
book
Suggestion
a book
books
the book
, it’s greatly in associate with family education;
this
Linking Words
 is the topic we need to reconsider in the future.
Submitted by graham.page91 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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