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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #information #research #business #world
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Some people perceive that it is beneficial to share all kinds of
information
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 in the scientific studies, business and academic world.
In contrast
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, some people think it may not be appropriate to share that
information
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 due to its value and importance. In the world of
information
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 explosion, people have these kinds of the discussion all the time. I think there are few aspects we can pay attention to for
this
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 controversial topic. There are some benefits for people to be able to access the
information
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.
First
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, people can enhance their knowledge and ability
thru
from beginning to end
through
 the process of retrieving the
information
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. They can get what they are looking for when they have problems and doubts. It may help the industry to save their time on training new people by providing their own tools.
On the other hand
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, If the
information
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 is transparent and public, it can be prevented from the secret criminal activities to sabotage the records or studies. Due to its shareable features, the
information
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 can be guaranteed as public knowledge.
However
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, if all the
information
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 is shareable, there may not be any confidentiality for the industry and
company
Suggestion
the company
. It may cause
threat
Suggestion
a threat
 on employees’ relationship. Take employee’s salary as an example. What if everyone can learn each other’s salary in a company? I believe the employees may feel
injustice
Suggestion
the injustice
 of
jealous
a feeling of jealous envy (especially of a rival)
jealousy
 between each other due to difference reward they receive in the same position. To sum up, I think there are pros and cons for the
information
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 sharing protocols. It is necessary for people to access all the
information
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, but we have to take security and privacy into the consideration when we share the
information
Use synonyms
.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
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