Some people prefer to spend more time improving their careers. Others think that it’s more important to spend time with family and friends.

People have different priorities in
life
, as some choose to focus more on their
works
Suggestion
work
while others prefer to have more
time
with their family and relatives. The following essay will discuss both opinions, but I personally feel that we should have a balanced view regarding the discussion. On the one hand, some people choose to spend more times in
career
development. These people believe that
career
would be the most important aspect of their
life
, as a successful
career
would change their
life
. They would be able to earn handsome money, drive a luxurious car,
live
go away from a place
leave
a big house, travel overseas or wear fancy clothes.
Therefore they
Accept comma addition
Therefore, they
choose to focus more on their
career
improvement. One of the ways would be by working longer and more
dedicatedly
than what an average employee would do.
Then
, they
also
would take additional courses and training which correlate to their
work
during the night or
in
Suggestion
on
at
during
the weekend. As a consequence, they do not have
time
for themselves and for their family and friends as well.
On the other hand
, other groups of people believe that family, relatives and friends are more important than works. They believe that spending more times with the family would have a positive effect on children's mental development. They
also
believe
that that
pointing out something
that
people should be close to relatives and neighbours, as they are the
first
one who will help during
financial difficulties
Suggestion
the financial difficulties
or natural disasters.
Consequently
, many of these people cannot improve their careers, because they do not want to spend some of their
times
Suggestion
time
for self-development. In my opinion, I personally believe that people should have a balanced
life
. It means that people must develop their potential and should
also
have targets and ambitions in their
career
life
, but they should not sacrifice the socialisation
time
as well. People should learn more about
time
management
such
as setting priorities at
work
,
therefore
they could
work
more effective and efficient.
As a result
, they do not have to
work
overtime and they could
some spend some
Suggestion
spend some time
time
with their family and friends.
Submitted by yashjsh6 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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