In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong while others consider as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What are your opinions in this?

Working is necessary for living as well as to gain some experience. It is often argued by people that, children who are involved in paid works are not good for them, while others think that, it is very useful that children can get an important job experience, they can be independent, and they can learn something
that is
useful for their career. I totally agree with the statement that children need to work.
Firstly
, all people needs money to survive, whereas students need the most if they are staying alone,
then
it helps them for their living and as well as for their tuition fees.
For example
, my friend is staying in the main town, whereas he always had difficulties paying his fees, but after he got a new paid job, he seems to relax more than he used to. So, working in terms of money is really essential for the children's who are living independently.
Secondly
, working in a place helps you to find out, what are your strength and weakness.
Moreover
, it
also provide
Suggestion
also provides
guidance on what steps should one take for their better future. As you job somewhere, it added a plus point of your C.V, you will get valuable experience which adds and extra skill on your talent. Not only that, children who works, they bound to meet new faces and can get new ideas
also
.
For example
, my brother who used to work in marketing, now works for one of the leading company in our country CG groups because of the experiences and knowledge he got from the marketing. In conclusion, allowing children to work is very useful for their upcoming future and
also
helps them to live independently.
Submitted by anishpanta51 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Checks your essay in seconds
Instantly see mistakes you've made and learn how to avoid them.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Read more in the eBook

The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »

* free ebook for Premium users

What to do next:
Look at other essays:
Improve your band scores without paying for expensive tutoring
After you write your essay, you will be provided with tips with examples of how to make your essay better in order to get a score above 7.