Do you agree or disagree that celebrities are paid far too much money? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#celebrities #money

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

In today’s world, we categorise

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

famous

people

Use synonyms

like singers, actors or models are the highest earners in society. It is said that they are significantly overpaid. In my perspective, I totally disagree with

this

Linking Words

statement, I will give reasons.

Firstly

Linking Words

, like other occupations, celebrities have to train and practice for a long period, in order to improve their skills and expertise. Very few

people

Use synonyms

have

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

gifted talent like beautiful voices or potential acting skills, so they have to make efforts to survive and be famous in the competitive environment.

For example

Linking Words

, many singers,

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

usually called K-pop idols, have to be trainees for a long time,

can

Correct pronoun usage

which can

show examples

be up to 10 years, before they can debut. Some reality shows record their process, and it’s obviously seen that life isn’t easy for anyone.

Therefore

Linking Words

, I think that the high salaries celebrities earn

Change the verb form

are

show examples

worthy of their attempt.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, it is a case of supply and demand. We create demand by going to see their concerts and buying their music. The well-known

people

Use synonyms

perform for us, they inspire us and their products help us relax and reduce

stresses

Fix the agreement mistake

stress

show examples

. In conclusion, I

believed

Wrong verb form

believe

show examples

that the high salaries of famous

people

Use synonyms

are not overpaid. Personally, I think it’s

Change the article

show examples

euphoria to pay for what

bring

Change the verb form

brings

show examples

a smile to your face

while

Linking Words

the celebrities are satisfied because they could dedicate their talents.

However

Linking Words

, more jobs in society just as doctors or teachers need to be paid higher because of

their

Change the word

the

show examples

hard process

to become

Change preposition

of becoming

show examples

successful.

Submitted by thvaan1.6 on Fri Apr 10 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

Ensure that your response addresses all aspects of the task prompt with clear, comprehensive ideas.

coherence cohesion

Your essay demonstrates good logical structure and overall coherence. However, ensure that your ideas are organized in a more cohesive manner to enhance overall readability and clarity.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

252 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

lucrative
revenue
sponsorships
merchandise
career longevity
market demand
economic contribution
role models
influence
entertainment industry

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices to what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?
The answer is complex since there are a lot of choices in our life and all of them are different kinds. In some cases, I would say that it is a good thing to have the ability to choose from a wide variety. Take for example gastronomy. Every single person has different meals on their list of favourites. Actually, if you have a bigger family, it is almost impossible to cook something that everyone would like. Therefore, I would say that it is great that you can go to a shopping centre and choose from a dozen different food types. I can always find something that looks delicious.
7
band
Most of the people in the society enjoy watching crime movies and criminal TV programmes. Why do you think people have more interest to watch them? What is the impact to the society due to this?
People's fascination with crime movies and TV programs is a phenomenon deeply rooted in human psychology and societal dynamics. Several factors contribute to the widespread interest in this genre, and its impact on society is multifaceted.
5
band
Logging of the rain forests is a serious problem and it may lead to the extiction of animal life and human life. Do you agree or disagree?
Cutting down rain forests is an alarming issue which if left unmonitered would lead to very serious consequences for animals and humans. Some people are opposing the statement by saying that it is just exaggeration. Well, I completely agree with the assertion of the damage which the delpetion of rain forests can cause to living beings and would explain my reasons in the following paragraphs.
<4
band
Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?
Lot’s of museums charge for admission while others are free. What’s the advantages and the disadvantages of charging people’s fees in museums?
7
band
Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past 30 years in the world that many cities now are "one big traffic jam". Do you think that this statement is true? What measure can government take to address this problem?
These days, a lot of cities have traffic congestion due to the constant buying of cars for the last 3 decades. From my perspective, this statement is correct, as it is evident from the traffic-related issues we face nowadays. Moreover, this is because of the increasing population and hence, the government should take measures to slow down the increasing population rate and limit the number of automobiles on the road.

Do you agree or disagree that celebrities are paid far too much money? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Fully explain your ideas

some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices to what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Most of the people in the society enjoy watching crime movies and criminal TV programmes. Why do you think people have more interest to watch them? What is the impact to the society due to this?

Logging of the rain forests is a serious problem and it may lead to the extiction of animal life and human life. Do you agree or disagree?

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past 30 years in the world that many cities now are "one big traffic jam". Do you think that this statement is true? What measure can government take to address this problem?