IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Nowadays, international tourism is the biggest industry in the world. Unfortunately, international tourism creates tension rather than understanding between people from different cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#tourism #industry #world #tension #people #cultures
It is said that the tourism industry is the biggest and most popular with the international tourist who come from all around the world.
Besides
 the positive trend, international travelling creates the conflict due to not understanding between residents from different cultures. In my point of view, I totally agree with
this
 statement. On the one hand, the tourism industry brings a significant amount of benefits to many countries and broadens the horizon of the tourists.
To begin
 with, the residents and government in the travelling countries will increase their economic and
also
 provide them a huge if job opportunities.
For example
, in Thailand, where people gain a higher income from selling the traditional foods, souvenirs and so on,
besides
, the government
also
 takes amounts of tax from those businesses.
Moreover
, travelling provides visitor a deep knowledge about the local areas or different
culture
, compare to search the information on the internet.
On the other hand
, the social conflict is ha
ppened d
Suggestion
happening
ue to the visitors just have a short time to travel and understand about a
culture
.
Initially
, a group of Korean as an example, they just have a short time to get the knowledge of Vietnam’s bread, so after the trip they have a really a bad comment about it and the tension between Vietnamese and Korean is increased.
However
, in every conflict, there will have the positive reply from the travellers from all over the world, so in my opinion, the negative recommends are just due to the fact that they do not understand right about a specific
culture
. To sum up, the tourists should spend a long time to get a deep knowledge about a
culture
, so the tourism industry will increase with an effective way.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: