IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Life was better when technology was simpler. To what extent do you agree and disagree?

#life #technology
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Technology
Use synonyms
 has influenced on our lives throughout human history, especially in recent decades.
In contrast
Linking Words
, some people suppose that te
chonology m
the practical application of science to commerce or industry
technology
akes us more complicated rather than simpler. From my perspective, I disagree with
th
Linking Words
is viewpoints b
Suggestion
this viewpoint
these viewpoints
y the following reasons.
Initially
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, modern
technology
Use synonyms
 plays an
c
Suggestion
a
rucial role in our basis daily, helping us do almost everything faster and giving us more chances to interact with globe. Thanks to
technology
Use synonyms
, most bu
siness a
Suggestion
businesses
re completed well.
For example
Linking Words
, we can easily write ea
says a
an analytic or interpretive literary composition
essays
nd prepare pr
esentation b
Suggestion
a presentation
y Microsoft Word
also
Linking Words
 Po
werpoint o
Suggestion
PowerPoint
n the PC.
In addition
Linking Words
, the existence of In
ternet h
Suggestion
the Internet
as contributed to limit the distance between people together. Students has chances of making friends with foreigners and bo
arden t
make broader
broaden
heir horizons through using some social network in
t
Suggestion
on
he Internet.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it is not too easy to deny the importance of televisions and music players with people. There help people to re
lxax a
become less tense, rest, or take one's ease
relax
fter st
ressful time a
Suggestion
a stressful time
t work and schools. It can be seen that Internet, computer, television ar
e g
Suggestion
is
r
eatest support o
Suggestion
the greatest support
f people at the moment and future. Especially,
technology
Use synonyms
 is the wonderful tool in most fields, especially public health. Doctors can have more problems if they work without
technology
Use synonyms
. Medical equipments replaced doctors to take care and heal patients.
For example
Linking Words
, the globe ar
e facing u
Suggestion
is facing
p to Corona Virus. Ventilators are major factors to support patients. The number of dead people will develop re
markably i
Suggestion
remarkable
f we work without ventilators. Ai
rplanes,
Suggestion
trains and cars are supporting people in fighting with corona virus.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, people should not depend on and waste most their time on
te
Use synonyms
chnology.
Suggestion
the technology
Today, people choose to us
ing s
Suggestion
use
martphones, computers more than hanging out and doing outdoor activities.
Technology
Use synonyms
 makes people do not want to communicate their relationships.
Additionally
Linking Words
, te
chonology
the practical application of science to commerce or industry
technology
technologies
such
Linking Words
 as smartphone, PC, television can lead to some health problems. Children easily have short - sighted eyes if they spend various ti
me o
Suggestion
times
n te
chnolgy d
the practical application of science to commerce or industry
technology
evices. Parents should control them and teach them how to use
technology
Use synonyms
 suitably. In conclusion,
technology
Use synonyms
 ar
e m
Suggestion
is
ore complicated, our life are mo
re easier a
Suggestion
easier
nd better. People should respect the contribution of te
chnoloy w
the practical application of science to commerce or industry
technology
i
th h
Suggestion
to
u
mans l
Suggestion
human
human's
ife. They
also
Linking Words
 need to have a suitable plan wi
th u
Suggestion
by
sing te
chnolgy a
the practical application of science to commerce or industry
technology
nd limit ch
ances o
Suggestion
the chances
f taking full ad
vantages o
Suggestion
advantage
f them.
Submitted by tranglinh916 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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