IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Today food travels thousands of miles before it reaches customers. Why is this so? Is this a positive or negative trend?

#food #thousands #miles #customers #trend
It is true that imported
food
 items need to travel long distances before they reach the supermarket. There could be several reasons for
this
 trend, and I would argue that it has both advantages and disadvantages. One of the obvious reasons for importing
food
 is globalisation. Today’s global trade with low transportation cost and fewer trade barriers has encouraged the transport of
food
 from one country to another. Another reason could be overpopulation. Some countries,
in particular
 developing countries, generally have significant growth in population. Due to
this
 it is not always possible to
fulfill
put in effect
fulfil
 the needs of their citizens with domestically produced
food
 and
therefore
 they have to depend on imported
food
.
Finally some
Accept comma addition
Finally, some
 countries do not have sufficient resources or geographical conditions to produce certain crops in their own farms. In
such
 circumstances, it is a good idea to get those
foods
Suggestion
food
 items imported.
Food
 miles can have an impact on people’s
life
Suggestion
live
. On the one hand, it can be a cause of global warming.
Food
 transport burns out a lot of fossil fuels and generates co2 emissions which lead to global warming. Another drawback is local farmers will lose
job
Suggestion
jobs
 as they will not be able to compete with
international market
Suggestion
the international market
 and
this
 will adversely affect
economy
Suggestion
the economy
 of the nation.
On the other hand
, imported
food
are
Suggestion
is
 cheaper that local products.
Moreover
, people will have a wide range of choice in
super market
Suggestion
a supermarket
supermarket
the supermarket
 and
also
 most
food
 items will be available to them throughout the year.
Furthermore
, we can use more land to build more houses. As population grows, we need more houses and other facilities
such
 as schools, wider roads and so on. If we do not have to produce our own
food
,
this
 land can be used for constructing more houses. In conclusion, while people depend on imported
food
 items for various reasons, in my opinion,
this
 trend has both positive and negative aspects.
Submitted by nosirjanov.x on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: