In today's competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents to go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents' absence.

Every parent wants to raise children who happy and successful.
At
Suggestion
In
the past, a father who worked
to
Suggestion
for
in
with
out side
beyond the boundary of; external to
outside
and a
mother
who stayed at
home
for looking after children. Nowadays, society is
norm
Suggestion
a norm
that why both parents
work
for money.
This
essay will discuss the reason in detail why
mother
stay
Suggestion
stays
in
Suggestion
at
home
or go to outside for
job
.
First
and foremost, parents want their
child
grow
Suggestion
to grow
up smoothly not financial crises. At present
more competitor
Suggestion
more competitive
than before atmosphere that why both parents earn money for future.
For example
, parents think that their children go to foreign tour in holiday. In sum of, properly maintain the society need good income that may, parents
work
together.
On the other hand
, some parents feel that a
mother
take
Suggestion
takes
care her
child
or family, stay in
home
more importance. Because father focus
in
Suggestion
on
work
and
mother
also help
Suggestion
also helps
to
Suggestion
with
child
.
For example
,
mother
teach
Suggestion
teaches
to
child
education and how to communicate with
other
plural of other; the people or things not already mentioned
others
. When I was
bringing
Suggestion
brought
up without economic crises because my parents
job
holder but I felt lonely.
This
essay discussed parents
work
. Someone believes parents
work
for better future children and others
mother
stay
home
as a housewife.
Therefore
, we
are not change
Suggestion
are not changing
do not change
have not changed
their
job but
Accept comma addition
job, but
give time to
child
Suggestion
a child
the child
that
Suggestion
that's
why after finish
job
come to
home
and holiday expend with their children.
Submitted by hmzahidbd001 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • dual-income household
  • financial stability
  • extracurricular activities
  • role models
  • self-reliance
  • independent
  • emotional well-being
  • work-life balance
  • neglected
  • quality time
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