Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?

It is often argued that some employees cannot afford to
workout
Suggestion
work out
when they are at workplace or in their leisure
time
and it leads
their
objective case of they
them
health badly.
Although
workers have not enough
time
to
exercise
, I personally believe that they should
workout
Suggestion
work out
.
This
essay will address the both sides why they
not have
Suggestion
don't have
enough
exercise
and what solution would be suggested for them.
First
of all, the reason that they have not so much
time
to train is
unflexible
incapable of change
inflexible
time
. Nowadays, people have to do a lot of things
such
as work, family chores and social activities.
For example
, some people should work hard to earn some money for their rent
otherwise
they
not pay
Suggestion
don't pay
the rent, are going to lose a place to stay.
Moreover
, some of them have to feed their children because
this
is the obligation as the parents. As I mentioned, people do not have enough
time
for
exercise
for
some
one or some or every or all without specification
any
reasons.
On the other hand
, when it comes to resolving
this
phenomenon,
government
could support them. The
government
should provide the people as a welfare because they pay taxes for it.
For instance
, when
government
Suggestion
the government
implements the welfare, people might take
more free dime
Suggestion
a more free dime
due to sufficient money. They can hire a babysitter for their children or pay rent
for
example
Accept comma addition
example, then
then
their free
time
to
exercise
will be increasing. In conclusion, less spend
time
for
exercise
might be harmful
workers
Suggestion
workers'
health but
Suggestion
healthiest, but
healthiest but
the
government
can help them to improve their lifestyle.
Also people
Accept comma addition
Also, people
could control their
time
for it.
Submitted by davidjeong90 on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Time constraints
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Passive leisure activities
  • Workplace wellness programs
  • Active commuting
  • Subsidized
  • Public awareness
  • Health benefits
  • Incentivizing
  • Accessible public spaces
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