FOR SCHOOL CHILDREN THEIR TEACHERS HAVE MOE INFLUENCE ON THEIR INTELLIGENCE AND SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT THAN THEIR PARENTS. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

#school #children #teachers #moe #influence #intelligence #development #parents

In the social and mental development of school-going

children their

Accept comma addition

children, their

teachers and parents have serious impacts. It is highly disputed of whose influence is more on their intellectual level. It is thought by some people that teachers contribute much more to the child's development than his family. In my opinion,

although

teachers' position

Suggestion

the teachers' position

teachers' positions

and instruments are crucial, it cannot outrace the

parents

Suggestion

parents'

parent's

role in terms of the intellectual advancement of their children. In

modern era

Suggestion

the modern era

, school-goings

has been spending

Suggestion

have been spending

have spent

more than a half of their day in the educational institutes.

This

results

Suggestion

from

the interaction between the teacher and the child to be more often and maybe deeper than the child's immediate circle.

Moreover

, the teaching settings are designed to improve the students' intelligence through educating

them especially

Accept comma addition

them, especially

in the fields of mathematics and science.

Also

, play groups are created in kindergartens in order for the young ones to socialize by playing with each other.

This

beneficial education is done by a professional teaching team. Thereby, teachers play a vital part in the

childrens'

Suggestion

Childrens'

lives. A survey conducted suggests that more than 40 percent of the young-aged men and women has indicated that they learnt most of the knowledge

Suggestion

life from their school teachers as their household have to go to work daily and came home tired.

On the other hand

, the parents have an undeniable influence on their offspring's intelligence. Before enrolling

Suggestion

the school, children are always

to their family who show them the distinction of the right and wrong and play games for hours. All these actions are carried out

spesifically

in distinction from others

specifically

for the children's improvement. In conclusion, the children are influenced by their school teachers as well as home teachers which are their parents in honing their certain skills. Despite teachers have

advantegous

giving an advantage

advantageous

effects on improving the youth socially and intellectually it is an

undisputable

not open to question; obviously true

indisputable

fact that parents play a more crucial role in bringing up their loved-ones and developing their important social and mind related skills.

Submitted by pbayrak16 on Sat Apr 18 2020

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

332 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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FOR SCHOOL CHILDREN THEIR TEACHERS HAVE MOE INFLUENCE ON THEIR INTELLIGENCE AND SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT THAN THEIR PARENTS. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

As parents, they should be required to attend parenting courses every year to bring up their children well and give them a better environment for growth. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The best way / the only way to reduce poverty(INDIVIDUALS / GOVERNMENT) in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. do you agree or disagree?

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country.