Many children are encouraged by their parents to get a part time job in their free time. What are the advantages and disadvantages to children of doing so?

#children #parents #part #time #job

Generally, it is accepted that, every single parent wants to pass children's free

time

with useful work. In order to fulfil it, the vast majority of children are motivated by their parents to get a part

time

job in their leisure

time

Suggestion

this

essay both merits and demerits will be discussed Throughout of human evaluation working has given countless advantages for human being. Especially, nowadays working is

particular

Suggestion

particularly

beneficial in terms of youth

such

as, working prevents from being spendthrift person.

Secondly

Accept comma addition

Secondly, this

this

can be best exemplified by me that, they shall absolutely learn working as a team.

Besides

this

event increases

between

Suggestion

among

people the habit of adoration

Accept space

Thirdly

, as it is frequently believed, they begin

comprehend

Suggestion

to comprehend

every single thing's worth.

On the other hand

, despite the huge advantages steaming from working, it is argued by many that, simultaneously, it has

drawbacks

Suggestion

the drawbacks

of to get a part

time

job among the children. It is commonly believed that children shall not have enough

time

to pass their priceless

time

with their parents, because if they have to work they work after school or maybe at night because of

curriculum

Suggestion

the curriculum

of the school, so it will definitely hurt them In conclusion,

however

, some people claim that, working among the children has disadvantages.

Nevertheless

, I reckon that there

are

Suggestion

massive benefits

steam

(linguistics) the form of a word after all affixes are removed

stem

from working

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

223 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

responsibility
punctuality
work ethic
financial literacy
budgeting
time management
work experience
career prospects
independence
self-esteem
communication
interpersonal skills
academic responsibilities
school performance
hobbies
relaxation
well-being
stress
fatigue
premature adulthood
childhood experiences

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Many children are encouraged by their parents to get a part time job in their free time. What are the advantages and disadvantages to children of doing so?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Thesedays, problems with pollution are becoming worse, particularly in large cities. What are the reasons for this and how can this be solved? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The exploration and development of safe alternatives to fossil fuel should be the most important global priority today. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. Do you agree or disagree?

Detailed description of crimes on newspaper and TV can have bad consequences on society, so this kind of information should be restricted on media. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some way.