IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Children who grow up in families which are short of money are better prepared with the problems of adult life than children who are brought up by wealthy parents. Agree or disagree

Who are better prepared to face the problems in adulthood – children from destitute condition or lavish background? Some believe that children who are from poor background are far better than those who are from rich families for handing the hassle in adult
life
Use synonyms
, I agree with them due to two reasons. The primary reason why
such
Linking Words
 a poor child is ready to handle the issues in the adult phase is that their parents teach them to be independent. It is true that poor families do not have enough money to spend on their children's education or support them in their studies, whereas,
such
Linking Words
 problems are not faced by the rich
class
Use synonyms
.
Hence
Linking Words
,
such
Linking Words
 families entirely leave it to them to work as part-time and pay their tuition fees, which makes them independent.
For instance
Linking Words
, in India, many children from poor families work as part-time in order to continue their studies and be independent. Another reason is that
such
Linking Words
 children from the poor
class
Use synonyms
 know the value of hardship and their
struggle
Use synonyms
 in
life
Use synonyms
. While teenagers from rich families do not understand the
struggle
Use synonyms
 for the accomplishment of any task, teenagers from poor families do not forget and struggles a lot until they achieve it.
For example
Linking Words
, in a school, a child from a poor family struggles a lot while sitting under the street light and studies harder in order to come
first
Linking Words
 in the
class
Use synonyms
, whereas, a child from rich background gets everything but gets passing marks in the
class
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
such
Linking Words
 children understand the hardship from their childhood which makes them strong enough to
struggle
Use synonyms
 in adult
life
Use synonyms
 if it's needed. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 some argue that poor children are not prepared for the problems in their adulthood, I disagree with them completely as not only do they know the hardship and
struggle
Use synonyms
 they face since childhood but
also
Linking Words
 become independent in
life
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: