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Writing Samples /
Band 4

Many students decide to further their study abroad. What are the benefits and drawbacks of studying abroad?

#students #study
More and more university
students
 studying
oversea
Fix the agreement mistake
overseas
show examples
 recently.
Although
 studying
aboard
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abroad
show examples
 can expand
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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worldview
Fix the agreement mistake
worldviews
show examples
, they may feel loneliness sometimes. In my opinion,
students
studied
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
 in a different country is better because they can
developed
Change the verb form
develop
show examples
 the skill of solving
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
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 independently. In my opinion, I
definetly
Correct your spelling
definitely
 agree
of study
Change preposition
with studying
show examples
 foreign country because
students
 can have more experience
to learn
Change preposition
of learning
show examples
 other languages and cultures, I think that will develop the capacity
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 open-mind thinking. First of all, studying
out
Change preposition
outside
show examples
 of
Correct article usage
a student
show examples
student
Change noun form
student's
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 own country, they can face more foreign people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 speak
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
different languages. The learning
enviornment
Correct your spelling
environment
 was globalized. Studying in a worldwide situation, they may find it requires
pushed
Wrong verb form
pushing
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 out
their
Change preposition
of their
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 own comfort zone and
meet
Wrong verb form
meeting
show examples
 classmates and professors who
from
Add a missing verb
are from
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other background
Change the wording
another background
other backgrounds
show examples
.
For example
, when I studied in Italy as a sixteen-year-old,
it's
Wrong verb form
it was
show examples
 quite hard to understand the Italian language. After I pushed out of my comfort zone
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
I was continually
to read
Change the verb form
reading
show examples
 the Italian academic article
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
. These challenging
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
show examples
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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reflect the main benefit of studying overseas because they make you grow success
characteritic
Correct your spelling
characteristically
.
Although
 studying abroad may
gives
Change the verb form
give
show examples
 you lots of
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
show examples
, there are some
fianicial
Correct your spelling
financial
 problems.
Students
 may
found
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
 it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
more expensive than
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
 in their own countries,
such
 as education
fee
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fees
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, accommodation and food. I
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
remmerbered
Correct your spelling
remembered
 that period when I studied in Italy, I had done plenty of part-time jobs to support my university life. Honestly, it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
consumed my time and energy and I
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
felt tired of
balance
Replace the word
balancing
show examples
 work and study
oftentimes
Rephrase
apply
show examples
. In modern days,
students
 gaining their
high
Correct word choice
higher
show examples
 education from foreign countries is increasing significantly. It's important to
studying
Wrong verb form
study
show examples
 with different
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
 and
background
Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
show examples
 friends even though may cost
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
 amount of money.
Overall
, I believe that spending more money is worth of high quality of education. Other version In my opinion,
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 will benefit more by studying
oversea
Fix the agreement mistake
overseas
show examples
 even though they may need to pay
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
 amount of money.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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