Sport stars are paid too much for what they do . disscuss

#sport #stars #disscuss

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There is a controversial issue about the income of famous

athletes

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. Some social workers state that their payments are excessively large.

However

Linking Words

, some coaches argue that they deserve that money. In

this

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essay, I will discuss both points of view and agree with the idea that they receive too earning. Let us start with reasons why some social workers believe that well-known

athletes

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are

overly paid

Correct your spelling

overpaid

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. The first reason is that their salary frequently does not correspond to their contribution. Many

sportsmen

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have huge incomes

Remove the comma

apply

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because they play in trendy sports clubs,

such

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as Manchester United or Real Madrid, but in fact, unlike miners and teachers, they do little for economic growth. Another factor is that their wages

causes

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cause

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outrages in society. Many employees have the average salary, which is enough to lead a modest life, but when they see how much

sportsmen

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earn, they feel resentment

Change preposition

for

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such

Linking Words

enormous injustice.

Therefore

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, after analyzing,

it is clear that

Linking Words

athletes

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' payment is extremely large.

Nevertheless

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, some coaches advocate that outstanding

sportsmen

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receive fair wages. They justify their opinion with the following arguments.

Firstly

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, they usually spend their life training hard. Most people enviously observe how famous

athletes

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live in affluence, but they do not realize how much they work to gain

such

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best results in world competitions.

Secondly

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, they mostly earn large money on

Replace the word

advertising

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. It is common belief in society that

athletes

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make a living by participating in contests, but

actually

Add a comma

actually,

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their income is largely formed from advertising products on TV, which is

also

Linking Words

under gigantic taxation.

As a result

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, after analyzing, it is obvious that popular

athletes

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earn fair salaries. In conclusion,

although

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some coaches propagate that

sportsmen

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with fame have decent earnings, I think that their salary should be reduced to an

approprate

Correct your spelling

appropriate

level for the

above mentioned

Add a hyphen

above-mentioned

show examples

arguments.

Submitted by yesorno06011999 on Fri Apr 24 2020

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph follows a logical structure and that ideas are connected and developed coherently.

task achievement

Expand on the introduction to clearly outline the main points of the essay. Provide a more comprehensive response that addresses all aspects of the essay question.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

301 words

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Sport stars are paid too much for what they do . disscuss

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

in the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think all lawbreakers should be put into prison, while others believe that there are better alternatives. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.”

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinino? What sort of punishments should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children.

The plans below show the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevelopment next year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.